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t: _ To SUbScribe for the
) WEEKLY N. Y. TRIBUNE.
Both Papers Sent to one Address
for $1.00 a’Year.
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ALMOST DROWNED BY DOGS.
Bietauset’s Narrow Escape From Death
in the River. .
George Bietauset, a New York Ger-
man brewer, has a big white bulldog
and a lively little Scotch terrier, who
are pets of the whole neighborhood.
The dogs are fond of the. water, and
Bietauset frequently had taken them
down to the river front near his house
to give them a little frolic. '
One night last summer, accompa-
nied by his wife and two boys, the
brewer took the dogs down to the
Jane street dock. They were fas-
tened together on the ends of a check
rope eight feet long, and he held the
middle of the rope while he stood on
the unprotected slanting gangway
near the street end of the pier. He
intended to kep one dog on the pier ‘
while the other had a dip in the river.
The terrier had a bath first. Bietau-
set held the check rope, while the
bulldog barked and sprang about in
frantic anxiety to join the terrier in
the water. The bulldog, in prancing
about, got the check rope, which was
stout and tough, so tangled around
one of Bietauset’s legs that the brewer
had to let go to free himself. The in-
stant. he released his grip the bulldog
sprang into the river, and its master,
being unprepared, was dragged from
his footing into the -water. He fell
headfirst, and the two dogs, tugging
at the rope, rendered it impossible
for him to keep his head above water.
Bietauset weighs about 180 pounds,
and does not know how to swim. His
wife, who knew this, became greatly
frightened and screamed to him, when
he got his head out of water, to seize “
the piles of the pier. The tide was
low and running out, and the brew-
er’s frantic eflorts to get near the
piles only caused his head to go un-
der water again. His sons, lads of 7
and 8 years, and half a dozen other
boys of about the same age, shouted
for help. Their cries brought several
workingmen from the brewery oppo-
site Bietauset’s home, but none of the
big fellows could swim. They leaned
over the strlngpiece of the pier, and
held their arms down as far as they
could toward the water and yelled to
their fellow workman to give them a
grip of his hand. But the dogs kept
tugging at the check rope, drawing it
more tightly around his legs and dous-
ing him under water.
Bietauset had been more than five-
minutes in the water, and was rap-
idly becoming exhausted, when 17»
year-old William Walsh came dash-
ing up, and seeing the brewer’s pre-
dicament, promptly sprang into the
water and swam out to aid him. As
he caught hold of Bietauset’s hair,
and held his head up out of the wa-
ter, the two dogs got the idea that he
was going to hurt their master, and
both sprang upon him: He had‘to
devote almost his entire energy to
beating off the dogs and keeping them
from dragging their master’s head un-
der water. It was a desperate battle,
and in five minutes Bietausetf'who
had swallowed a deal of salt water,
became exhausted and fainted away.
His wife, who had been a helpless
spectator of the struggle, gave a loud
scream and fell back upon the pier in
a faint. The urchins around the pier
and the brewers scurried around hunt-
ing for a boat, while Walsh kept
shouting for help. Five- minutes
passed before the men found a row-
boat, a half a block away. They
jumped in and rowed to the pier. Bie-
tauset was completely unconscious
when they dragged him and Walsh
into the boat. .
Searching for a W'ife.
He made up his mind he ought to
marry, and then he started on a still
hunt for a good, sensible girl for a
wife. -
He saw a young lady on a crowded
street car who was not occupying two
seats, and he thought: “This is prom-
ising. I will keep my eye on her.”“
He met a young lady on the street
who wore a gown that did not trail
in the dirt, and he thought: “She’s
worth watching. She has some
sense.”
He was suddenly pushed against a
young lady in a crowded corridor,
who did not stare at him and mutter
“Awkward brute’” when he apolo-
gized, and he thought: “There’s a
gem, truly.”
He was introduced to a young lady
at a ball who was not overdressed,
and yet who wore a waist that was
visible to the naked~ eye, and he
thought: “Tastehmodesty and. sense.
That’s a good combination.”
He sat behind a young lady in a
theatre who took 01f her hat, and let
him get a glimpse of the stage, and
he thought:. “Consideration for others
is a great point. I must find out who
she is.”
He stood behind a young lady in a
dry goods store who did not paw over
everything in sight and keep one clerk
busy for half an hour that she might
buy a spool of thread, and he thought:
“She must really be a tieasure.”
“Queen of your sex!” he exclaimed,
impetuously. “Beacon light in the
darkness of woman’sways! Shining,
star of progress toward a better con-
ception of the courtesies of life! Wili
you be mine?”
And she said she would if her hus
band‘would let her. '
.But he collapsed.
Sorrow Laden. :
“Troubles never come-singly,” said
the man who secured a divorce.
“What’s the matter?”
“Oh, first I got clear of my firs:
wife, and then, like a fool, I married
agalin.”——Phil-adelph-ia North’ Ameri—
_ can.
Coast Defences Needed.
“This country needs better coast de-
fences!” shouted the stump speaker.
“That’s right!” cried a voice. “Com-
ing down hill every searcher ought tr
have a bravkel’t—Puck.
*“fi_ ‘—
.7 '.
'2.“ FLASHES OF HUMOR- ‘
Latest Funny Things Evolved by Our Es;
temned Contemporaries.
He—If we were not infla canoe I
She—Take me ashore instantly, sir.
~Pick-Me-Up. '
I
would kiss you. i
3
I
When the average man is satisfied .
he- generally keeps still, reserving his
conversational power until he has a.
grievance.
She—Why does a wcman take a
man’s name when they get married?
His—Why does she take everything
he’s got?—Boston Globe.
Miss Gowan-s—I envy the way you
can talk to Mr. Cvaus-tique; he never
sits on any of your remarks.
Miss Gotham—No; I make them too
poin ted—Judge.
Cooney Cohen~Mein sohn, vhy did
you guarantee dot overcoad to lasd
Mr. Nixy as long as, the lives?
Young Cohen—Fader, he has heart
disease-she d-ies any minultel—Harlem
Life. ‘
Gentleman—What is your hurry,
Pat? Haven’t you all day in which to
finish the job?
Part—Begonia, Oi’m throy'in’ to finish
me job before the dom paint gives out.
-—Judg’e. -
[Last year 4,000,000,000 cigarettes
were smoked in this country. It is not
countenancing the youth-killing joke
to say such numbens are calculated to
take away people’s breath—Philadel-
phia Times.
Bingo—I shouldn’t think you could
aflord to let your wife go to so man
matinees. ~'
Kingley—Why not? It keeps her
away from the dry goods stores at
least two hours and a half.
He—EAs near as I can get at it, the
general idea of heaven seems to be
a place where it is always summer.
She—Yes, and the proportion of men
to women will be about as it is at,
most of «the summer resorts. Am I
right? -
Daughter—This piano is really my
very own, isn’t it, pa?
Pa—Yes, my dear.
“And when I marry I can take it
with me, can I?”
“Certainly, my child; but don’t tell
anyone; it might spoil yor chance‘.”—
Tit-Bits.
“Is dis where dey want a boy?” .
“It is; but he must be a boy who
never utters an unltrut‘h and does not
use slang or swear, and never speaks
unless he is spoken to.”
Well, me brodder’s a deaf mute.
I’ll send ’im ’round.”—Church Prog-
ress.
Sport Friend—What do you call ’em,
Tom? .
Tom—We 'haven’st named them yet,
but my wife, who .is a member of the
Episcopal Church, thinks of calling
them “Cherubim” and Seraphim’” be-
cause vthey continually do cry—From
Texas Sifter.
‘A newspaper publisher in an Ok-
lahoma town, where the women re-
cently carried the election, sent the
following order to a supply house:—
“Please send us one small cut of a
hen. Women carried the election here
and I suppose we will have to swing
out a hen instead of a rooster.”—
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
, “We shall soon have the worst,” he
mutter-ed.
He n-ervously.flitted from place to
place, pausing now and then to swing '
his hands.
“We shall soon know.”
His wife was about to silbstitute col-
lar buttons for pins, and :he felt that
a crisis for a new woman was at
hand—Detroit Tribune. '
A man was in the dock. charged
with theft. He pleaded “guilty,” but
the jury’s verdict was “not guilty.”
The judge was not at all satisfied with
the result of the trial and remarked
to the prisoner: “You do not leave
this court without a stain upon your
character, for by your own confession
you are a thief and by the verdict of
the jury you are a 1iar.”—Prick-Me—Up.
Cornshucks-Bings is getting to be
a humorist.
Redwood—I haven’t noticed it.
Cornshucks—He is. I passed his
house yesterday and he was sitting on
hte porch with his feet over the rail-‘
Eng where «the sun would strike them.
He said he was putting a coat of tan
on his shoes—Cleveland Plaindealer.
HIS RULING PASSION.
Proprietor—Pat, how do you like the
fight? _ .
Pat—Oi only'have wan objection.
Proprietor—What is that? .
Pat—0i can't get in it.--‘New York
Herald.
.—
' _ ‘\ ‘ \ ‘ ‘Ox \ v I \
_ 8% max mnxr:\:\ ‘ ‘ »;\ «\Q“ ‘ \X.\\1\\::\\:* mtg: . ,
, , . y.
+ as Tight _
? joints are what you find on a “Bay State ,3
. 7 Furnace.” The fewest jOints possible inside {,6
the casings and these carefully fitted and sub- 9'}
' ject to equal expansion. - Those in ash—pit and it ~
fuel-door necks are entirely outside the casing; :x:
preventing the escape of gas into the hot air g;
) chamber when coalingr—a. point of vital impor- ,3 1
y tance Where drafts are poor.
Barstow Stove Co. ’ '
228 Water St., New York
Foundries—Providence, R. I.
Boston Office—56 Union Street
is handsome, light, durahle. Such grace ct design as
a - 4n ‘ l r '
rs cmbocucd 1n thus “fast, easy-running, m'uch—talkcd-
about” mount can only be secured by the most
approved methods, finest material and skilled work-
‘ mans ip.
A The ’ 96 Stcarns is the best bicycle it is possible to
G produce.. Finished at your option in orange or black.
x Address now for beautiful new catalogue.
“the Yellow renew."
E. C. STEARNS 6: (30., Makers. Syracuse, N. Y.
SAN FRANCISCO? CAL. TORONTO, ONT.
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H. R. BULKLEY 8:. 00.. Agents. SOUTH NORWALK.
‘ "<1
' 3M
Towle Vault Light. Company,
MANUFACTURERS.
VAULT LIGHTS. SKYLIGHTS
ViNDPATENTLIEHTDESiGNS.
Factory: Office: ‘
48" BRIGGS AVENUE, I51 ELM-STREET,
BBQOKLYH. NEW YORK.
’ AT oNcE.
The Columbia you want is ready for, you. 3.1 Not a 'day’s. delay,
if you choose regular equipment. . We have been preparing“ for
months to meet the present great demand. «2 .
.s .0 m w . Mén’Sflnlumbias
'00 Au!“ Women’s columbias
Tandems, sI50 Tandems
THE STOCK IS' GOMPBETE. p ~
HARTFORD Blevcrrs
$65, $50, $45
Such quality at such prices is unheard of. But Hartfords are .lead-.
ers in both price and goodness. Regular models ready for delivery.
POPE MFG. CO., Hartford, Conn. .
Branch Stores and Agencies in almost every cit and, town. If Columbias are not‘ properly
. 7 represented in your vlc nityplet'us know.
Hi
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Norwalk Chronicler