' age, 87% 11—11:; EveNmo GAZETTE. ENTIGBED AT Tun PosT OFFICE IN Noawm as A NEWSPAPER. M 4.1L S UB3 ORIPTI ON 8, DAILY. one year. :3; six months. 31.75; three months. 81. 00; one month 300. WEEKLY, one} year. in jradvance. $1. 00; six months, 600.: three months. 8:0. jaunsDA—YTKUEU'Q 13. 1896. _ THE WEATHER—Forecast for t;- day: Fair and cooler, preceded by, thunder—showers. The temperature yes- terday: Highest, 95; lowest, 83; averw Cooler to-morrow. ' o City Bookkeeping. ‘ [From the Norwalk Horror. ]' “The business methods of the two 4 cities are about as unmethodical as they can be. * * * The committee chair- man is practically the absolute autocrat of his department. In this city, We have three members of each committee, and two are dum- mies. No formal meetmgs of the 01m- mittees, are held, and no record is kept of their proceedings. . The council meetings are invaded by ' citizens, and the council becomes prac- tically a committee of the whole to hear ,, what they have to say. And yet more than 375 000 00 a year is expended in the two cities, in this loose and irresponsible way.” Of course our town and city] afi‘airs are never going to be run in any other than a “loose and irrespons‘. his way,” until they are run by this self-consti- tuted royal nibs, the editor of the Nor- walk Horror. He would run them as he ran St. John’s Lodge; as he ran the Bruggerhof canvas; as he assayed, but failed, to run the Hill campaign; as he ran Selec‘man Daskam and $500 in cold cash out of our town treasury, for a pretended week’s service as school teacher. ' .9. ._. A Parrot Story for Bryan. There is an old story of a parrot that might be interesting, and certainly should—be instructive to William Jen- nings Bryan about this time. this way: It ran in Tige, a pet bull-terrier, was lazily ,doz he: by the fireplace, and Polly was ’ 'j‘pluming herself on her perch and am- bitious to air her conv rsational powers. . .. :Noticing the sleeping terrier, she , com- , ,_ _menced, in imitation of family expres- s’ons, “Sic ’em, Tige; sic ’em, Tige.” . Tige lingu diy opened one eye to see who called him and what was wanted. As no person was visible he closed his eye and resumed his peaceful slumbers. Byeand bye, Polly, who was of an adventurous turn of mind, descended from her perch and was waddling around on the fl)01‘, when she repeated the expression, “Sic’em Tige; sic ’em Tige.” Tige again lazily opened his weather eye, and seeing the parrot as the only thing 7 within range, made a dash at Polly, resulting inza short, sharp and decisive confl'ct, in which Polly lost- most of her plumage, with only various scratches and bruises as compensation. . Finally, she extricated herself from the grasp of the terrier, hastened to her perch for safety, when she began taking an inventory of the few remaining feathers, and ended with th1s sollloquy : “I know what’s the matter with Polly; she talks too much.” As a well-wisher of William Jennings Bryan, we respectfully suggest that he paste this story in his hat. I Facts are stubborn things, but rhe- torical fancies quite otherwise. _ Don’t Get Nervous About the Heat.- ‘The excessive death-rate from heat exhaustion during a heated term like the present should not be taken was an indication of a generally unhealthy The victims, they are, represent those with low vital- condition. ity, many of them from the immoderate use of alcohol, and others from age or former debility. The excessive heat carries these o'fl’just as the grip during its recent visitati0ns found most of its vic‘ims in this class. The ordinarily healthy person, who eats, drinks and Works moderately, will suffer a great deal of discomfort, but nothing worse. It the sanitary condition of- the city were bad, there would 'be:likely to be epidemics of cholera infantum among the children, and of typhoidfiever and dysentery among the adults. As a mat- ter of fact, Norwalk was never more free from the usually‘prevailing hot weather diseases. We now have the promise of a cooler temperature. AN ENTHUSIAST. Mr. L. Hayden. of Wallonia, Ky., is en- . thusiastic in his raise of Chamberlain s Colic, Cholera and iarrhoe‘a Remedy. He says he has Used it in his family for years and can safely recommend it to the public as the best medicine in the world for bowel troubles. The 25 and 50 cent sizes for sale by Ezfiflged, Druggist. :yer. eyes onto. numerous as. .1J , r .3... ' 1-1“sz 11109112111 'IT n; A QUESTION OF ROOM. ' " Pli “lit ofa Young Man Who Had Given l Theatre Invitation. Ho Icoked troubled as he pushed two matinee tickets through,,,; ' oflice window and asked: "Can you give me two I re seats next to these?" , V j The ticket seller hastily looked through a bundle of tickets that he took from one of the little pigeonholes in ; front of him and shook his head. "I can give you two seats just in front. , of them,” he said. ~ “Won’t do,” replied the man in f1 out of the window. “Can you ttke these back and give me four in the row just ahead?” , “No; there are only two left there, answered the ticket 'seller. “I don’t see now I am going to at range it, ” said the young man who wanted the tickets, thoughtfully.‘ I must have three seats together.” “Three?” exclaimed the ticket seller. ' “I thought you wanted four together.” “I do. " returned the other, “but that isn’t absolutely necessary. three together, I can sit somewhere else myself. ” “I should think it would be pleasanter to divide the party pretty evenly ," sug- gested the man in the box ofiice. “It would,” admitted the man outside of it. “but it can't be done. You evi- dently don’t understand the case. . You see. I bought these tickets withthe, in- tention of taking a young lady to the matinee. and it never occurred to me that I would need more than two seats.” “Overlooked the chaperon. I sup- pose?” “Chaperon nothing!” When I pay for a chaperon there’ll be skating in Anglist. _ I overlooked the fashions— that’s what I overlooked. I saw her last night in the gown she expects to wear, and now I am trying to buy a seat for each of the sleeves. why I must have at least three seats in arow. If youcan give them "to me. ._ trot them out; if youx'can’t say so, and I’ll send word to her that I‘m sick and give my tickets to some one else.” Charles Dudley Warner's Fun. Charles Dudley Warner wandered in- ':to the offices of the Civil Service Com- - missioner the other morning looking for Prof. Proctor. Finding that the latter was engaged he sat down in the recep- tion room to wait. Lying on a table be- fore him wasa pile of blank applica tions to be filled out by people who want to be examined for Government positions. He picked up one and .amused himself by answering the questions they con- tained. He then asked the messenger for an envelope, which he addressed to He inclosed hisappli— , Prof. Proctor. cation, laid it upon the desk with other mail, and his name now appears in the list of those who desire to appear before the Board ‘at the next. quarterly examt ‘ ' nation. Some of his answers were character- istic. Opposite the question whether he has any relatives in the'Governmenl service he writes: “No doubt." “Are you addicted to the use of to- bacco, intoxicating liquors, morphine, or other drugs?” “I use liquor and tobacco 1n modera tion.“ ., “Have you ever been convicted of crime?" “Not yet.” “Have you any impediment in your speech?” “I usually speak without notes.” “Have you any defect in your hear- ing?" ”No; I hear too much,”- Chicago Record. Reasonable Scepticlsm. “Stranger,” he said to the traveler 'who had stopped at his unpretentious homefor a night’s lodging, “hev ye ever hearn tell ez how of ye see a red- headed girl, ye’re boun’ ter see a white boss?” ’ “Of course. That’s an old idea.” “I hearn it some time ago myself.” “It has some basis of fact, too. You see. the case simply is that there are more white horses in existence than there are red- headed girls. So their ap- pearing at the same time is a. more than likely coincidence.” “Well, sir,” replied the householder, in a tone that defied controversy, “ye kin Call it a. coincidence, er what ye please. I call it a durn lie. See thet gal over there?” ‘ ‘ers.” V “Her hair’s red, ain’t it?” “It’ s— —it’ s quite auburn.’ ‘ “It 5 rod, that’ s a dead sure thing, Jan I ain t ashamed of it. She’ s my wife. The day before I married her I had one of the purtiest white bosses ye ever laid Hoss thief come along While the preacher was apernouncin’ the ceiemony. girl, but I ain t seen no white horse sence; ter see none.’ Star. — Washington Evening The Vice of Overeatlng. How much harm is done to health by our one sided and excessive diet no one can say. Physicians tell us that it is very great. Of the vice of overeating, aspracticed by the well-to do classes, in England especially, Sir Henry Thompson, a noted English physician and authority on this subject, says: - ‘ I have come to the conclusion that m01e than half of the disease which ombitters the middle and latter part of life is due to avoidable errors in diet and that more mischief in the form of actual disease, of impaired vigor, and of shortened life accrues to civilized man in England and throughout cen- tral Europe from erroneous habits of eating than from the habitual use of alcoholic drink, considerable as I know , that evil to be.”—-Sanitarian. Judge—Have you anything to say be- fore the judgment of the court is passed upon yOu? ~ Tough Prisoner—Beggin’ yer Honor’ s pardon, have ye heard the score, J udge‘l eePhiladelpriia Record. -Advert1se in the GAZETTE. If I can get . That’s ' 1 1 c- TH EEVEN... ‘ ~ GA, ....i , 1: CHECKER—BOA RD . BU SIN Essf DIRECTo'fRy. NORVVALK ' Safes For Rent. ' ' V_ , ' "wants STORED EMBOSSING . 1'5 Fill} Illllll’fllllit CO. H, _ ‘ 1.. l In Successful Oper. safe DEPOSIT Vault DONE AT . ation Since 1860, or THE , Na Outsranding Claims. , . NAE::§::AE:FK ‘ THIS: OFFICE. K d GAZETTE ADS. m... Miller. coon RESULTS H1111 3. Sheila Bunting. 6. Ward Sellsck, ' " , ‘ . 3‘: BEST GOODS. ' ' TEAS and. cprrsss . . . . _ . 18 WALL s’r. i ”' ransnnrrsmrri ' Call at 58 Belden Avenue, if you are go- ing to set out trees ‘ , this fall. All stock 1 . . . - warranted to live. ' Edgar Buttery, 58 Belden Ave. .» - 25 ears foreman of oyts’ Nurseries. . 1. Frank ’1‘. Hyatt PARLOR ' , -. D E ' ' ’ actuators. ' II 4-7 Méun Street. 8 West Avenue. . 1131! . WEED’S . .. SODA WATER 1 38 Wall St. ENTERPRISE = Bottling Works, . ' 7' Wall Street. . ‘ HIE MES All) MG“ EXPBESSLY FOR PAM- ILY use. Mail orders receive ‘ V . ' prompt attention. ‘ , . , I l JohPrmiIng rvrnv mm"... -‘ nxacornn A’I‘ THE . ' x ‘1 Q _' ; 4,- 5’ . GAZETTE OFFIGE . .. 1‘ ‘ , v . ‘_ I’ve got the red- headed . An what’s more, I don’t expect' NewYor andNoiwal reigh Line 'oouusuomo 1101111111,.1uus 22. PROPELLERS Oily oi Noiwalk. Earle - and Vulcan Will Leave Pier 23, E. R., N. Y. (Beekman‘ St.), For South Norwalk Daily 3. 10.30 A. M. Extra Boat Monday We luesday and Friday at 5 P. M, 1 For ,Norwalk Monday, Wednesd ty and Friday at 5 P. M. For New York Leave South Norwalk Daily at6 P M Leave NOI‘WEllk Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday at 5 P M. Just. Rec SSVSS...‘ A Lot of w OODEN 111010111 HANDLE. 111113, Which 1 will sell, for the flex. week, at $2.50; per pair. 1 ’ ' Also have a look at my line of (1111111111153, moons, siovolss, 11111111533 11m lions: 1100113. 1101110111111 10 snow oooos, 15111511 111001111 vou no 1101 1111111111131. W Repairing Done at Short Notice. ii LUTHER. M. WRIGHT. carriage Factory and Repository, Franklin 81 Madison Sis... .So. llorwalk. . ' l GREAT REDUCTION SALE at 750.21 pair. OF AT THE WHITE SHOE STORVE, DURING JULY AND AUGUST. ., 0111 Men’ 9 $5. 00 Tan Shoes Reduced to $3.50 a. pair. Our Men’ s $4. 00 Tan Shoes Reduced to $3. 00 a pair. Our Men’s $3. 50 Tan Shoes Reduced to $2. 50 a pair. Our Men’s $2.50 Tan Shoes Reduced to $1.48 a pair. Three Hundred pairs Men s Congress and Lace Shoes worth 35'. 125 at SS@. A PAIR. 308 Pairs Men s $2 Lace and Congress Shoes at $1.48 a pair We will sell the balance of our immense stock of Ladies’ Tan and Black $3, 00 Oxfords at $2 00 a pair. Two hunched Pans of Ladies’ $1.50 Russett and Black V0xfords '8 Ho ES 4 Two Hundred Pair's Lac ies Tan Lace Shoes at Swl. S© A PAIR WORTH $3.00. Three Hundred Pairs Child’s Russet Spring Heel, Lace and Button Shoes at 500 a pair. This 1s the greatest lot of Shoes 1n town for the money and we Want you to come and examine these goods for yourself. . _ A Full Line of Trunks, Bags and Ladies’ and (tents. Mackintoshes. “ ' W OLSEN BROS. . 3GAZETT E- BUILDING, NORWALK. ‘ Pattern No 2, is in great demand, and orders are being received right Ail—NINN 51L... The Reduction in Hartford Bicyéles‘ haslprov‘ed a‘ drawing card India, ' ' along. Come in and examine it. Columbia, standard price to 5114100 The s. r. 1min: oycn 11...,"19 Wall Street. .»
Norwalk Chronicler