8! JAKE. GOLDEN
[I 1.70.
daily on Sunday It!
Company.
BORED 1'0 DEATH
V By Walt Moon.
Icsomctlmcs tall; till I am dizzy
about the prehistoric Lucio in which
,1 daily ride: I boast about its divers
splendors. about its bumpers .and
its lenders. and of the works inside.
I hand out anecdotes gigantic. until
my aunts are fairly (rustic. they
yawn their topknots loose: they are
not stirred by motors tooling. by
tales oi Lizzies callyhooting. ins-
pired by John D.s Juice. ’lhey'd
talk about a. female creature. a
mllliner who makes a feature of
rum me when I'm Ipiclln. of tlrod
but dauntless autos wheeling through
mud and sandy flats. I Litenupt
them when they're telling at some
dame mortgaging her dwelling to
buy a lid sublime: they find my
epic tales displeaslng. and say to
me. in accents freezing. "Your con—
duct. is a crime." They grieve me
with their foolish chatter about
cheap things that do not matter. and
so I say, “Ods beans. I'll leave you
females to your twaddle. and up
and down the street I'll dawdlc. and
play the slot machines." Alas, how . ~ . _ . . ; . ' . '
.much we here each other! The ‘ ‘, '- 1 , ., , .. > .1 . (
'hlooming sister bores her brother. , . '. ' . - . __
ltho husband bores his wife; our
Iaunts are boring all our nieces. we
bore each other all to pieces. _;md
such is modern life.
Things We Use
CHI-“VINO Gig.“
Chemical research work is being
conducted to make the Chewing
gum industry all-American. iiy the
artificial ‘iri‘paration 0t clilcio and
other gums. Expeditions a: sclen~
tiSis are being sent to explore Jun-
glcs in the aid of this research
work.
Meanwhile, your stick of gum is
dependent on chlclo tro~ii trees in
Central America, says the National
Foreign Trade Council. ln_“Uur lili—
ports and \Vlio L‘so ‘l‘llclli."
“‘e are the world's olil,’ iutmn of
gum chewcrs. With us it may be
said to have become a substitute [or
chewing tobacco. “’e iii'iiiufactnrc
annually some ten billion sticks, al-
most as freely as tho Gelulan limits
maths. ,
'l'ut-ankh-Juncn lived in Pharao-
liis splendor and knew not chewing
gum. The ancients had their gurus.
gum’ arabics and what not. They
didn't get any pleasure out at guiu.
’l‘liey applied it in cinbalmmg fluids.
to medicine, along with balsama
Now and then they put gains in hull
oils and perfumes. but not in their
months.
3'“?
y
l
filly-g 1 a
White is the garden With snow.
And the place where the tulips will
grow
In the spring is asfhcrrss and bare
Asaheartthatistornbrdespoir.
\
HeETITZ
-safe and sound in tangible as-
sets Ind tum-11031. management
and progressive in every action
thit will contribute to the
growth of Norwalk.
_THE_
CENTRAL FAIRFIELD
TRUST CO.
NORWALK, CONN,
iii
it}
“£21
. . I,
There's a moa‘n in the breeze. audio
#811 ~ . ‘
0n the lips of the
J!
w
“trees. and the
I
sky
Lies over the rose bed as block_
As the pallor or grist on a check.
Yet I stand at the pane in my room
and see where the roses shall
bloom.
And I turn to a patch 'oeeth the
snow
Where some day the tulips shall
grow; _
\
i
v
l
I
‘ plasmas-nil: an.
I, m stops-o. M c“.-
1IIII ooeoscscoceocooooo 89.00
“to .. ............. «.50
”"‘-‘a. nos-oseoococooocso ‘3.2‘
» . ct your homo—11 cents
'1' . . per week.
' . II. we Press is exclusive-
i 'W to the use for publication
, allows dispatches credited to it
.H ” ”who in this newspaper
in are any local news published
.
I.
1
l
i
1-11.".
v
l
I hays faith in the blue at the sky
When the long “yl 0: winter to by.
I have faith in'thc bud andthc
lent. . .
How then for my winter at grist?
{The tulips shall blossom. the rose
Once more shall its petals enclose-
Is this longing for happiness vain.
Shall I never more claim it saint
.q... o
H v, ..
{I
, Ill‘.
mu oi publiution o: swell-l
Al herein are also reserved.
011 and Politics
lcndal in Washington is coming
forth in a fashion that. reminds one
5 of on oil guslicr. There seems to
. b) barrels alter barrels of it. Iii-:ii
day brings out a i‘cw more barrels.
It fl unremitd and has a bad odor
it is beémlrchlng many who to
the general public lune been lUt'ktd
. .titon on pretty good citizens.
“in Both Republicans and Democrats
. fir are trying. at times. to bccloud the
issue by declining that this pli'll)
me“ is merely a battle to gct issuts
irr the coming presidential i‘i'lll-
pain. l’erliapri this is true but it
the fight brings any good rt‘sulls Ill
,3?“ the way or better oil‘iclals so much
W tile better tortlio people at largo.
' ' There can be no doubt that i'rcs-
. ldcnt Coolidge was right in refusing
is ‘ to demand the resignation of Suc-
1' ‘ .‘vtll’y Dcnby. Dcnby. however. is
‘.' in a bad position even though he Le
not. guilty or any illegal act. ills
1 connection with the case has made
"‘1 it. impossible for him to continue as
a" a cabinet onion. Yet to resign lili-
" der lire would iliake the public think
'1’" ' ho WI.- Suilty. So he lnust rciiialii
until some definite evidence ot cor-
":‘AAV ruption is brought out against him
or until he comes i‘loni under the
‘ cloud 0! suspicion.
The developments from the alums-
‘- tloning of Frank Vandei'lip may be
at volcanic force and then ther; is
the 81,000.000 slush lfund to be
heard from. '
v’w
ll
l
A Public tribute will be polite
Dr. Charles W. Eliot. president eme-
ritus of Harvard University. at Cam-
bridge. on March 20, the occasion
oi‘. his 90th birthday anniversary. It
will be attended by representa-
lives at the alumni and leading citi-
zens. ‘ ‘
Dr. Eliot. who was born in Boo-i
ton in 1334 was president or Harv-
ard from {869 to 1909. His elec—
tion was‘ considered remarkable.
first because 0: his youth and sec-
ond because he was a layman and a
scientist. During his administration
he led in the development of gra-
duate schools and the elective syso
tom in undergraduate work; Under
his direction the medical and law
schools of Harvard University grew
to their present importance and in-
fluence. ' A
The raising of entrance require-
ments of universities. which has led
to a corresponding raising of stand-
ards ot graduate schools. and the
introduction of choice of entrance
HIS Booxs. requirements have had 1' nation-
My days among the Dead are past; \vlde influence under Dr. Eliot's
Around me I behold , leadership. As chairman of a com-
Where'er these are mlttee of 10 o! the National Edu-
Cttst, 'eailonai Association in 1880. he ex~
Directors
of this bank together with its officers consult
on all loans and investments. Their experi-
ence covers a wide field and their decisions
SAFETY
both for this bank and its depositors.
THE “‘()M.-\.\' or IT.
Mine. Marguerite l-‘iilinly,
French “onion who Il‘llll‘dt'l'l'tl llic
Egyptian prince Who “as her lins-
ness out in the "provinces."
After reading the New York pa-
pe‘rs with their stories of little boys
being lntrusted to carry hundreds
lh':
casual eyes
The mighty
\Vith all these
a there should be no
1;; put the the out.
Investigations such as these have
gone on (or years. shall we say tor
And yet the (let-per the
. worse human
.: nature seems to be. It these mat-
" tudcouid bo divorced from politics
b perhaps we could get. gonlc\vh.ll‘:.
" centuries?
ne'Jirobe goes tho
'¥
. The Bachelors
it there are
today as
; the“ were day before yesterday!
Well we wonder
'. many baChelors-[orcver
»
port of that situation.
the j
bu so expansion last
and
speculation
smoking
' there must be lire SUlliCWlIJI'U and
whitewash
A Reserve Bank in 1923.
Pierre Jay. chairman ot the Fed-
crutltcservc Bank ot New York has
with public the ninth annual
The report
that an unusual factor at the
year
(cu d in the absence of that heavy
overstocking
foods which frequently characterizes
pet“ s at unusual business activi-
‘ty. ; This is ascribed mainly
sound policy 0! caution on the part
- of both business men and bankers.
’ ' . THE “'EATHEI‘
1
Southern
New
[My and Saturday, warmer
' somewhat colder Saturday.
York—Generally
tern New
England—Fair
I at Friday and Saturday.
y night.
l'dlllOlri
10
as
re-
\Vul
of
ton
Fri-
colder
ot the ancients make up for.
time.
gum in
Europe. Asia. and elsewhere.
thought
thing in .
the tundamentalicts is their inability) “mm“! Muck is really Charles lie-
to discriminate between the theories
of evolution and evolution itself. \Vo
had even so prominent a fundamen-
ialist
Straton. in his debate last week with
Itcv. Charles I". Potter. tilting vai-
iantiy'ngainst the theories or evolu-
tion with the idea that by denioilsh~
ing them he would be wiping out
the evidence of evolution as u. phe-
nomenon or life.
\\'c are helping the unset-odauts
lost
We buy the base pioduct
increasing guanilues to
Chicle imports alone average sov-
cn to eight million pounds. More
than this quantity or
gums from the jungles at Central
and South America and the Dutch
East Indies are mixed in huge boil-
ers with the chlclo to make it plia-
ble. to prevent it from crumbling
when dry._
specialized that. alter the liner is
impregnated. 500 sticks per intruto
are wrapped and put in packages.
other gotta
The machinery is so
ITNDAMENI‘ALISI' ERROR
’l‘o‘any one or a logical habit of
the most extraordinary
the denial or evolution by
as Rev. Dr. John [touch
We do not know what electricity
or magnetism are. But we do know
that it
around a bar ot‘iron and pass an
electric current through the wire.
we wind a. copper wire
the bar will become in magnet and
band and got a lot of soils from piti-
pilatilig readers or the scandal-mon-
ging sheets by her sobbing sforv
oi the liuniiliatioiis a \\'csteru wom-
an inllst undergo “ilt‘ll she marries
an Eastern man. is now engaged to
marry ii cousin of the maxi she kill-
ed.
.’ C II I
SPEAKING Ul" L‘UGNOML‘SS.
Alter all, what is in a name? The
real name or Al Jolson is Asa Yocl-
son: of Mary Pickford. Gladys
Smith. of llla Claire. Ina Pagan:
of Marie Dru-aster, Lelia Koerber; or
Mitzi. Magdalena liaJos; of Conway
Tearle, Frederick Tearlc; of Rob-
ert \Vurwick. Aobert '1‘. Bios; of Lew
Dockstadcr. George .tltrcd Clapp:
or Ilenry Miller, John l’egge; of
Shirley Mason and Viola Dana. sis.
ters. Shirley and Viola. l"lugmtli.
Lauglilin; Eddie li‘oy. Ildward Iv‘iiz-
gerald; llazvl Dew“, Hazel Toni;
Nora Bayes. Nora Goldberg; and
Trixie I-‘riganza. Delia O‘Callalian.
O O I \
The editor of the Aliamont. 310..
Times is it Comical Cut-Up. "A
monologue." he writes. "is ‘a conver-
s'atlon between ll. man and his wile.
A dialogue is where hvo persons are
speaking."
. 0 O
“'15 HAVE TO BE SKEPTICAL'
it seems to be common supposi-
tion that the big business men of
New York are the superiors of busi-
or thousands of dollars through the
xii-eels, and their stories about big
business men and their loves one
love letters, we doubt it.
C O 0
Man 108 years old says he hasn‘t
used tho phone but once. 'XVeIi.
getting the right number in
length at time is a. pretty good rec-
ord. .
0’ 0
Slang has oozed into the sym-
phony orchrstras. too. A friend of
ours who plays a "tin whistle" in an
orchestra supplies us with the fol-
lowing vocabulary: .
VIOLIN—Fiddle. Instruments or
small value referred to as a “Fool-
worth Strad. '
\‘IOLA—Ii‘iddle's big brother.
CELLO—Wooden saxophone.
SAXAI‘IIONE—Tin cell.
DOUBLE-BASS—Dog house.
PICCOLO—Tln whistle.
FLUTE-File.
CLAItINET—Swine-ettc.
times the goostsione. _
FRENCH HORN —-'1‘wcnl.§ot’our
feet or pipe with a cramp.
TRUMPET—Rag horn.
TROMBONE—Slip horn.
BASSOON—li‘agot.
TUBA-Oom-pah.
'i‘llE TYMPANl—Soup kettles.
PERCUSSION SECTION — The
kitchen.
The English horn has no nick-
name because it is neither .Engllsh
Some-
nor a horn.
that
minds of old:
My never-{ailing friends are thov.
“’hith whom I converse day by
day.
\Vith them I take delight in weal
And seek relief in woe;
And while I understand and feel
How much to them I owe.
My checks have otten been
dew'd
“’lth,tcars of thoughtful grati-
tude. .
bo-
lliy thought. are with the Dead;
I i with them
lved in long-past years.
Their . virtues love. their
condemn.
Psi-take their hopes and tears:
And from their lessons seek and
find
Instruction
mind.
My hopes arc~
anon
My place with them will be.
And I with them shall travel
Through all Futurity;
Yet leaving here a name, I trust
That will not perish in the dust.
ROBERT SOUTIILEY
-——-—__~____-
The De. W.
.(New York Commercial.)
Lenin was buried without cere-
monies ot a religious character.
Like the thief and the highwayman.
the vicious and degenerate. he did
not believe in God.
Hating ”all things churehly. deny-
faults
with an humble
with the Dead;
on
. clue and doctor or
cried a strong influence on seconda-
ry education throughout the coun-
try.
Dr. Eliot has received many hon-
ors from European governments.
He belongs to a number of educao
-tional and scientific societies in this
country and Europe. '
Besides his bachelor and master
or arts degree- from Harvard. that
university has also eonierred upon
him the degrees of doctor of medi-
tters. He ai-
so has received d on trom sev-
eral other American universities and
the degree or doctor of philosophy
from Brsslau University.
An old negro who made his liv-
ing. as he said. "by takin‘ in white-
washln'. tloor cleanin' an' portion-
tar Jobs." met one or his customers
shortly after the iii-st of the year.
“How are you this morning, Un-
cle Dave 7" asked the white man.
"Well. nah, \‘rn des dat good dat
I‘m gwine 10 live for sander year."
was the mly. ‘ ~
“How can you be so certain oi
um?"- i .
"Hits dis 'er way. I allure no-
ticos dat‘when I lives twel New
Year's I allus lives anuder year.”
was the triumphant response.
——__‘__
The world treats the momentous
business or spooning, as a Joke.
“My little man." aldeacon mid
to a small boy. “have you no bet-
ter way of spending this holy 81b.
bath afternoon than idling away
your time on your front lawn?”
Your check account is'cordially invited.
I
So. Norwalk Trust Co.
SERVICE and SECURITY
Have We Served You Well?
Nothing pleases us more than to hear someone say
that he or Ills likes to come into our bank because We are
mm. Wodating and render prompt and efficient
service.
. It is our ambition to do all of these things; no L.jzod
bulk “'3 ho!” W NEW." long witho 1: public confidczzcc.
We appreciate your business.
exert a pull upon any other piece
of iron in proximity to it. 'i‘hechs
no question or the genuineneis oi‘
the phenomenon even though all
our theories to aewnt for it may
be wrong. We can see and. feel the
thing happen. though we— may not
know why it happens.
The cxillcnce in support of the
Wdlllons—l’ressuro was low
Tlflnday night over the northeast-
mi. flutes and Eastern Canada and
{pin the southern plain state-.1 and
Rocky Mountain region westward to
. {It I’aelile coast. There have been
'lofil snows within the last 21 hours
in “In Lake region. the upper Ohio
‘ y. the middle Atlantic states
log the existence or a Supreme Bo-
lng, teaching that mankind has no
other use or function than to live
and die. like a beast or the ilcid.
Communism. in one leap goes back-
word to that beginning or things for
the human race when the Stone Age
human animal thrust the bodies at
his dead outside the cave to be eaten
“I ain't tdlin' away no time." the
little man exploded. "There's a
teller inside spoonin' with my sis-
tor. and she's psyln’ me a nickel
an hour to “watch out tor pop and
mom."
N
He Has It Bad.
London Mail
-_ The City National Bank
South Norwalk, Conn.
rain: . . and the appointment by
the court or two or more attorneys
on fat salaries to aid these guard-
(SOYI-IIKNM ICN'I‘ TRYING T O
CH PICK l‘l.‘ I'LOITATION 01“
“inborn New England.
temperature
”Hill-iv?! 111““-
" .. pt for meal snows in West-
J New York the weather Will be
y (air throughout the Elasti-
iorccast district Friday, but
.' advance at the \vest-
.Aflturhancu Will be attended by
‘ F - cloudiness on Saturday
Alpitation is probable by Su-
nl‘ht as far east as the up-
anloy and tho soothe-in
~1- ‘ n region and in the AL-
tcs by Sunday.
"£23m ' ~
North 0: Sandy Hook-
northwes'.
generally tali- Friday.
Hook to Hatteras—Pun)
and Weather-”(air Friday.
' “West and
\VJI
, day almost generally cast
4” temperature will not change
in the eastern and south-
states during the next two
, erfltli.
. ion taken at ll pan. 75th
’ to. how list-en Weather
Bar. :I‘tici. Wen.
so.“
29.30
29.73
29.84
23.84
30.10
30.08
:13:
29.98
29.80
30.04
20.02
:m:
29.76
30.10
:9."
29.98
. .21 so
.‘slocooo.
Clan»...
plum
son-osc-
.coldocz.
ass-oases.
. outs-es...
”Ville u...-
’ use...
4 z
"5.... .
25.66.
30.76
7d
3‘
:6
L"
30
{ll
3!
68
:H
(G
18
5‘
26
2'.’
70
It!
42
0
)2
.18
alas. ,
“30- 1* um
hlgiier
-0[
phenomenon of evolution is almost
as strong as this. It is true that we
cannot see and feel evolutionary
changes as we can see the motion
or tile armature towards the mag-
net or feel of the pull betwucn them.
This is because evolutionary changes
are so exceedingly slow. But“ we
tin the evidence of those changes
and
clear
clear
snow
clear
show
clear
clear
cloudy
cloudy
clear
Cicar
clear
cloudy
cloudy
clear
cloudy
clear
9‘9“! .
cloudy
e;
wr tten
minds of men and other
most
dcnce being supplied by‘the fossil re-
mains of animals of past ages. The
intelligent.
acquainted with all this evidence no
danger doubts the genuineness of the
natural phenomenon we call evolu-
tion.
indelibly in the bodies and
animals.
important physiological evi-
open ' mind thoroughly
It does not avail. the fundamental-
ist. then. to prove wrong the expla.
nations of evolution offered by Dar-
win or anybody else.
be wrong and the fact still remain.
The fundamentalist. to get anywhere
in an argument in the scientific
ileld. must prove
which now seems so unmistakably
to establish the genuineness of ev-
olution. in reality demonstgatcs some
other phenomenon.
mentalist lie-remotely silcceeded in
doing that—Waterbury Republican.
They may all
that evidence
And :no funda-
———-—————————————————_
American Can income
The American Can Company for
the year ending December 31. 1923.
reports net income of $10,983,094
alter charges and taxes. equal utter
preferred dividends to $19.68'a share
on it 341.2233” common stock. com-
pared with net income of 810.433.-
350, or 818.50 a share. on its com-
mon stock earned in 1922.
1:. \V. Phelps. president of the
company. said expenditures (or new
construction during the year a’ggre-
gated 34.831335;
with continuance-of tavorable trade
.und industrial conditions business in
1324 should at least equal that done
by theoompany in 1823. . ' 3
He added that
.d-.‘—_-n———--—-—-—-
lNDiAN 'l'lllllliS. SAYS
COMM] SSIOSER
Commenting on revelations of
wretched conditions among till my
lion's Indian wards in Oklahoma.
Charles II. Burke. Commissioner of
Indian Affairs. said recently that
the Government is trying to cheek
exploitation of the Indians at the
Five Civilized Tribes. ills bureau
has been aware of conditions in
Oklahoma {or some time. and he
said: "Legislation that will stop
the wholesale mismanagement and
prevent unconscionable attorney
fees is contemplated."
“We have realized," the Com-
missioner continued. “that some
change in existing law with refer-
ence to restricted estates in Ohio.-
homa is needed and at the oioper
time We will bring the matter to
the attention of congress." 0
Mr. Burke said the bureau ha
supervision over all Indian estates
in Oklahoma except those ot- the
Five Civilized Tribes. and to cases
or large restricted Indian estate:
the owners are declared incompe-
tent and guardians appointed by
the State.
“we feel.” Mr. Burke declared.
"that the department ought to
have more control than at present
and instead of turning over (undo
to guardians we believe they could
better be disbursed through the in-
strumentality oi the Government."
“Conditions complained of.” he
said. "do not most the approval or
the good people at the. Stats and
the State bar." He called atten—
tion to a recent report at the State
Association, which stated:
"The.gcncni tiumoil existingdn
the State and e constant plunder-
ing-oi public «an those rwho
consider their
a llecnsoto‘lugo'
outline-3s at election .7
inns and administrators in the
‘taiihtul. proficient permanence of
their duty' and to keep their clients
at large. "lilie the widows. orphans
and wards'go hungry and poorly
clad .causes one to wonder why .he
should die and leave an estate in
Oklahoma. The depressing street or
these conditions in this State are ap-
,parciit to all but 'thc, (sithfui and
lucky ones.' . . .
"it is .to be hoped that picsent
conditions in our State may soon be
regarded as unpleasant history to
which none will care to rottr. and
that when we meet again we may
point with pride to a state of pros-
perity and happiness." -
A farmer driving along a coun-
try road was thus accosted by a
young man: "
“Hello. Reuben! Give me aJitt
to Boontown. will your” »
.The young man climbed up and
beguiled the time with lively chat.
tor. aunt’s. tow mila had been
traveled. he said: ..
“It‘s quite a distance to Boon-
town. isn't it?" . . ,
“Quite a distance." answered
tarmer. - g 1
After a few 'more \ sales the
young (man asksdr “any, firmer.
how far is it t .Boontaown. - any;
way?" ' ..- . ~~- .,
"Well." replied
(“kecpln' right on thev'wntw‘yc‘a'crgo-
tag new. I lho‘nid my it: would be
about twenty-live mm miles or
so: but it ~you wanted= to get out
and walk back. it wouldn't. be very
muehzmore than umdtar- -
'l‘lfi'wieiuha
. :cm'
«some:
. It
the
l
was
the . turner.
7-}.
‘bcy; the wild animals or merely bur-
in them in the
might not attend his‘ 1:31:10 that they
0! things worshipful those primi-
tive human beings knew nothing.
They were the first Communists—-
and the best. ,
All that is truly admirable and
praiseworthy in the world. as we
know it, has sprung from those who
have worship. and the more rational
and intelligent the worship the
greater havebeen the achleVemcnts’
or those meeting such advanced be-
liefs. ‘ , .
Themecpls dominated b
emanating from the Bibieyatf: 31:3
the .roremost in the world in all
things praiseworthy and which cons
tribute to the happiness and welfare
or mankind. This preeminence ts
explained solely by the enlighten-
ment which has come to then:
throw their belief in the Bible
and their adherence to the lofty
principles and uplifting impulses. it
inculcates. ..~Onr material “warn-r
and even mechanical promos- ‘
well as advancement in the “do:
arts. derive Item it either directly
or indirectly. ‘ ~ " ' "‘
asidoin‘fldo people pause to reflect
upon: the. debt yhey owe to this book
_ot’b‘oo_ks.»‘!i'§~thc tannins otjths ‘world‘ ‘
“Do you play golf?"
“No. but I can’t give it up." ‘
.‘ f
.172 Yeérs Ago
Benjamin Franklin said:
‘1 man may, if heirncws-not
how to saves-linger.L
Slices for Little Ones
11“.?“th Moccasins. ”limited with White. blue or
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Dress Slices with durable solos and spring heels.
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