‘ Wiring”, turned the Tables
’5. on an Irate ladle. V
‘ Inn the impel-turbable American
“newspaper man" could not
lusting froid displa ed recently by
I Well known Lon on journalist.
m gentleman was cited to appear
fia‘witnees in a case. and waited on
tilhis patience was exhausted, when
he called out to afriend, who was
also in the antechamber, that if he
were not summoned within five min-
“ he should go away. Thiswas
overheard by the judge of the court,
whohappened to be passing during
a temporary adjournment. Address-
ing: the journalist in a passion of of-
fended diaity, he said:
“You will stay here as long as I see
fit to keep y u. You appear to be
Ignorant of 6 power of the law.
Are you aware that if I were to sum-
mon Prince George to appear before
me tomorrow and he refused I could
he him arrested l”
With the most innocent air in the
world the journalist replied, "If I
were you, sir, I would not arrest such
an important personage, who, in ad-
dition to being heir presumptive to
the throne of England, is also the
Duke of York and occupies a high
position in the navy.”
‘ “You don‘t understand me," said
the judge impatiently. "I said if I
chose 1”-'———
“Of course you will do asyou please
in the matter,” said the other phleg-
matically, “but to arrest Prince
George is a serious matter.”
“I never had the least inten-
tion”-———
“And besides," continued the jour-
nalist, “there will be trouble when
hisroyal highness the Prince of Wales
learns that you intend to arrest his
eldest son.”
“0h, stupid 1" cried the judge.
“However, that is your own af-
fair,” went on this diabolical jour-
nalist. “Iam much obliged to you
for telling me of your intentions.
Assoonaslamfreelshall hurry to
the ofiice With the exclusive news
that Prince George is to be arrested
tomorrow. It is tomorrow you in-
tend arresting him, is it notl”
But the judge had heard enough.
In despair he turned on his heel, and
calling out, .“Idiotl Imbecile!" fled,
. leaving the journalist standing, with
asardoniii smile on his lips—Cleve-
land 'Moflett in New York Recorder.
Boyle O'Rt-Illy'a Swordsmnnship.
Boyle O'Rcilly was a skilled swords-
. man. He told mo that when he first
cameo. fugitive to this country he
ught he would maintain himself
giving lessons in broadsWUrd, sin-
gle stick and foils, and it used to give
himgreat pleasure to put a foil in
y hands and say to inc—for I pro-
ess to know nothing of it--“Ned, on
l Now, run me through.
, tine anywhere you can. Kill
me if you can.“ And then, with a
smile upon his face, he would ward
oflmy lunges, until suiting his pur-
pose, he would send my sword flying
acrossthe room. Often on our ex—
cursions he would say to me, “Ned,
take that stick and cut me down."
He wanted no play about it. Ilc
wanted an earnest fight, and comply-
ing With his wishes I Would often
rush at him with a stout stick in my
hand only to have him luughingly
repel my nttflck,.lu1d those affairs
generally wound up by his giving
me a whack over the slmuldors tlxut
nearly broke mo in two. «Iluunhou‘s
Magazine.
The T (iii-darn Used by the llomnns.
In discussing the use of iron on a
large scale by the Romans, Mr. (lord
ner writes: “From Pompeii we might
infer the total absence of construct-
ive ironwork in Roman architewturo,
yet Professor Aitchisou claims that
in the baths of (.‘urncalln a large coil-
ing was supported on iron girders.“
This fact might be stated less doubt
fully than those words would imply,
since some tons of broken iron Tgird~
ere were found a few yours ngo dur-
ing the excavation of tho great cells
soliarlsof the Thcrmn of Caracalln.
These girders hnd‘ been cased in
bronze, and they Wore arranged so
as to form squm-o panels, which Were
filled in with concrete do muted with
mosaic and delicate stucco reliefs, all
colored and gilt, thus forming a
strong and richly decorated not coil-
ing, with a span of «summons width.
«Saturday Review.
Boarding Plants.
“What do you want for that palm I"
asked amen of a florist, whiting at
the same time to a tall and healthy
kentia. “That isn‘t for sale," replied
thoiiorist; “it’s in boarder." “A whim”
“A. harden-went here to be taken
, cure of while the folks are away.
Ya, we have quite a number of such
, A couple of months under
' #— doss them good, and they get
Welland looked after. Aankn
would be ruined by leaving it In the
“yard while its owners were on
W vacationkuNr-w York Sun.
» Girls In Guatemala. ,
. None of the maidens in that coon
were allowed to go almond from
their homes without the company of
Mann, and a lover is only al~
. ' tome and court his sweet
' 7 through the heavily banal
' , of her father'shome. Alter
, 1' men J ‘
rmind. When he entered the dry goods
1 r: l , D H1,
The Ieuphyfibl H
Out Ills Practical Wllo’l Km
”John.” said the practical wife to her
metaphysical husband. "I wish you would
zodowu street and get me three yards of
white lace and two pounds of sirloin steak."
John, who tool: no earthly Interest In in
anything. less abstruae than Kaat’a philoso-
phy. started off on his errand, repeating his
wife‘s command over and over on the way
lest he should forget it. ‘
"Three y a of whlte lace and two
pounds of a rIqu steak. Three yards of
white lace and two pounds of slrIoInstcak."
he kept repeating over and over all the way
to the store. But before he arrived the
steak and the lace were badly mixed in his
store, he was repeating rapldly to himself: .
“Three pounds of sirloin lace and two
yards of white steak, Two yards of White
sirloin and three pounds of steak lace."
He was comcious that he was somewhat
mixed, but he knew he wanted lace of some
kind. So he umrched up to theyouug salea-
womnn and boldly said:
“I want some lace."
“Yes, sir." she replied. "What kind,
please?"
“Sirloin lace, I believe.” .
"Why, really,“ replied the snleswomau,
"that must he anew variety which we have
not yet secured. Are you sure that is the
name?"
”No," said John. ”I only know I want.
three pounds of lace of some sort."
“But we do not. sell It by the poum ,"
said the snleswonian. repressing the giggle
that it racked her immortal soul toholdln.
“\Vcll, then." said John, “I'll take three
gallons.”
“\\'e do not sell it by the gallon either,"
she said, holding in the earthquake snicker
that was bursting within her. "We sell it
by the yard."
"\\'cll, then. give me three yards," said
John, “but be sure it. is not stale. l al-
ways insist upon having fresh food upon
my table."
“But lace isn't food," said the salcswom-
an.
“Isn't. it ?"asked.lohn innocently. ““‘ell,
give me three pounds‘er—ynrds of it, What.-
el't'l' it is, and let me get off.”
“But what kind do you want. sir!" asked
the snlcswomun. “Point lace. applique.
chmlvd, Brussels, Chenille, Clu’uy, Muchlin,
llouiton, Dresden, \‘nlcnvicnucs, llaxnarw
scene, antique or SILXUIU'E”.
”I don't know." said John. "I mieas you
better turn them all in the can together,
stir ’em round and mix ’em up. and than
i shall be sure of getting some of the kind
my wife wanted me to get.”
The lrrcpressible giggle here burst forth,
and the snlr-su‘mnnn’s life was snvrd.
After she had recovered from her spasm
of laughter she said:
“Perhaps you can assist me some in ne-
lectlng the lliilt.‘ ifyou will tell me (or what
purpose your wife wants it.”
“Well. slu- is putting up canned pouches,”
said John. "Perhaps she wants to put. the
lace in them."
Here another giggle came to the explode
ing point, and John turned on his heel and
went. out In disgust.
All hunch hc Went away mad, he resolvml
to finish his errand as best he could. So he
Wont into the butcher‘s and said he wanted
three yards of steak, but he couldn’t re.
member for lln- life of him whether it was
applique. llnxnarmcvne, Vulcncieunes or
nntique steak that bu was after.
\Vlu-u John nrrivrd home without either
his lucc or his steak, his wife said, “It is
just as l cxpecled.”—New York World.
Invaluable Relic. /
innkln—l think u great deal u "that
old violin. It's a genuine Anmtl. (pick;
ed It up in Ilonw. _
Fylc—lt seems to be remarkably well
preserved.
"Wonderfully. It cost men pile of mon-
ey, but it‘s worth It. Tho chief merit of
a rim.- old violin—certainly, inspect ltas
closely as mu plvusa What were you
about to 5:. 1
"I was “'1 .. luring: how the maker ever
come to stvncil 'World's (.‘olumhiuu expo-
sition. l‘hivugo.’ on the Inside of it. "—
Chicago Tribune.
Thu- l'l-rfcct Man.
MmquNo, nmmmo. Mr. l’lucid may be
all you my, Iun lilo with him Would be too
lllllllllrlllll,ln1v-:ll(ullll and uneventful. l
cannot marry him.
Mrs. Livrly ~ Why. what, could buvcgiven
you such no him of him?
Maud—Well. i saw him transact some
business over the telzfiihone, with the usual
results. and he m-vcr even lost his temper.
He Is too new a ezllllt for incl—Puck.
.\ Comparison.
Mrs. Ilourdomn (hlnilinegl—dlow do you
like the quality of this collcc, Mr. Holler?
llnller—lt reminds me of mercy.
Mrs. llourdman (severely)-—Wllat do you
uni-nu?
llnIIer—~ Why. tho quality of mercy Is not.
struincd.-llrookIyn Life.
The Home Thing.
Dick Hicks; I overheard Mrs. Dix say
that l nmlwl a spanking.
Mrs. lIh-ksrv h‘hr sold you needed a stern
lmnd.
Illck llll'li‘i‘ l nupprm- (hm wusIu-r polite
way of putting lt.~-Ncw York World.
Yet ll» Ought to Ila.- Proud.
" Probably a nun; ncvvr feels so svunll, "
sold Uncle Allt'll Sparks, "on when hls
wlfo some» to hIm and says: ‘My dear,
Johnny can’t wmr your raatoll clothes
any mom. They're too little for him."—
Chlcugo Tribune.
Whore Ila (frawled.
Mrs. ’l‘lmldw Did you everflnd a man un-
der the bed?
Mrs. “lull—Yes. The night we thought
there were burglars in the house I found
my husband timer—Tinnitus.
No line Waiting.
Flm Boy» Come on.
Second iloy— Wait. They are raising that
big safe to that upper window.
First Boy—Well. there ain't anybody un-
der It. Come on.-»Good New;
I'M {lam-l.
Fsdltlwilly duo-maker. Mme. Mentallni,
must be Inning all her trade.
"slew—Why?
Edith—She sent my new dress home the
day It was promised.-—'l‘ruth.
Till. 2.0““-
Daughwr-Whotl Marry It, Monlbogsl
I hate him; I despise him; I abhor hlml
In. do Fashion-“Hm, child! You
needn't tell him so until after you marry
him—«New York Weekly.
Hummus-a ‘
she—Dun your flatmnlrmr I shall
mliihd mi ‘ tummy»
Now is the lime to buy when ulcers are the
Wall Paper never has an or will it
as , as we are
Illa It. Noteith-
stadiums: sunfish has:
onemlower.
Commencing June 20th, until further
notice we will give a discount of 10 per
cent. on all our grades of Gilt Papers
and Borders, we have a large stock and
must sell it, as we do not wish to carry
it. over.
, —-0UB—
PIOTOREFRAMINO
nrrsnrnasr‘
Is complete. We carry the [arrest stock of
Mouldings. and our prices are I is lowest for
first class woxlr. Our Mats are out by machin-
ery. We can sell them lower than parties can
that cut them by hand. Picture moulding by
the foot. A lame assortment of unframed
pictures. “'0. are the only one that carry a
full line of
ARTISTS’ NATERIALS
For Crayon. Waterand on Work.
The famous art amateur studies. Regular
price. 35c; our price. me. We have a gold paint
that will not tarnish. and can be washed, loo
and :5c a bottle.
-————-..o————
PAINTERS’ SUPPLIES.
Coach Colors and varnishes Our prIr-es are
the lowest for first class goods. “it do not
keep seconds.
Pnlutlng. Paper hanging,
Decorating and 1' rescuing.
L. H. Decker,
79 Washington St. So. Norwalk
l5: ”J. FLYN N
Plumbing. Steam and Gas lilting
108' WASHINGTON ST.
J. F. Flynn will have personal l'lanrgr of this
department.
Plumbing overhauled and put in first, l'lflrs
sanitary condition.
PORTER WATER MOTOR
Best. In the world. Call and get prices.
mII tl'
sign Writing.
, , , , w is “Bargain 4 Da
Spring Dress Goods,
Marked Down from 750 and $I.00 to 50015. Marked Down from 3907
and 506 to 25C.
Fancy Silks for Waists
Marked Dorm to 25c and 50c. Bargains in Other Goods. ‘
A. Diokerman & .101,
84- WASHINGTON STREET. SOUTH NORWALK. CONN.
\
I’ll)lNTS.——Very long body, very short gear, very high wheels, ve . _ _
indicated,very elastic where elasticity is required,therefore very true an light runmng.Spnngg as
sensitive as air cushions, that may be deflected by the hand, but sustain 600 pounds. New B
stiff where rigidity is
. . . 9’
circle under half made solid in front axle. Perch connection made solrd,1n back axle. The beau-
tiful Richards axle that runs a month without re-oiling. Draft in direct line with shaft shackles;
New Bailey steel bound indestructible dash. Pat. spring cushion for seat. High foot rod, and
foot room enough for anybody.
I’M-tiles! wagon on Wheels. Stylish, convenient. light-running, strong.
han .
B ru “SWiC k Traps You ought to come see It. Wagons of all kindsd, New and second
car. Mallsnn and mum Streets, L U T H E R M . W R I G HT,
80. Nomad.
1
THEODORE SAYS:
Never Before in South Norwalk’f
s9
.’.\‘ ‘5:
via-i
WAS THERE ANYTHING LIKE THIS “OFFERED
One loinli I
LADIES’ DEPARTMENT.
500 Pair Ladies' Kid Oxford Patent Leather tip; Worth 81.25, at 60c.
500 Pair Ladies' Kid
500 Pair Ladics' Kid
nual Sale of Summer loads.
Oxford Patent Leather tip/Square toe; Worth $2.00, at $1.00.
Oxford Patent Leather tip and Front Stay; Worth 82!)”, at $1.00.
300 Pair Ladics' Nice Russet Blucher Oxford; Worth $1.50, at 05c.
300 Pair Ladies’ Russet Oxford Common Sense—Just the Thing for Sore Feet; Worth $1.50,:atfisc.
100 Pair Ladies’ Hand Welt Patent Leather tip Kid Oxford; Worth $3.00, at $1.50.
200 Pair Ladies’ Whole Fox Big Button Razor toe, Wing tip Shoes; Worth $4.00, at $2.00. _
200 Pair Ladies’ Fine Cloth top Whole Fox Razor toe, Patent Leather tip; Worth $4.00, at $2.00.
200 Pair Ladies’ Fine Cloth top Whole Fox Square toe, Patent Leather tip; Worth $4.00, at $2.00.
200 Pair Ladies’ Very Fine Kid Big Button Crimp Vamp, Patent Leather tip; Worth 04,50, at 82.50.
200 Pair Ladics’ Kid Big Button Square toe, Crimp Vamp~The Latest Thing Out; Worth M50, at $2.50
300 Pair Ladies’ Kid Button Patent lip. all Sizes. This is a Dandy; Worth $1.50, at $1.00.
300 Pair Misses’ Spring Heel, Button, Plain toe; J. F. Swain’s Make; Worth 82.00, at $1.25.
MEN’S DEPARTMEN .
100 Pair Men's Fine Square toe Lace Shoes; Worth 2.00, at 1.25.
300 Pair Men’s Fine
400 Pair Men's Fine
300 Pair Men’eFine
Calf Lacee and Congress; Worth 3.00, at 1.50.
Calf Blncher, Cap toe; Worth 2.50, at 1.50.
Calf Blucher, Piccadilly Cap toe; Worth 3.00 at 2.00
350 Pair Men’s Fine Russia Callelucher Welt; Worth 3.50, at 2.26.
Ladies’ and Gentlemen these are the biggest bargains ever
l
i
ll
3| Washin
offered
0; H. 0L8
in South Norwalk.
Norwalk Chronicler