Norwalk gazette, Friday, July 31, 1896 · page 11

 

 

WISH’T I WAS A GIRL.

Wish’t I wus 'a gurl,
Stid uv bein’ a. boy,
An’ bang my hair, an’ eat ice cream.
An’ ride ahind my feller’s team,
Like gurls duz—
Wish‘t I wuz a curl!

Wish‘t I wus a gurl,
An’ when’t come Sunday nite
l’d Whack that old pianner,
Just clean up outen site.
An’ I’d marry sum rich feller,
Like girls dun—-
. Wish’t I wuz a curl!
Wish‘t I wus a girl,
I’dchaw gum an’ talk,
An’ when out ter promenod
I’d take up all the walk.
Like some girls duz—
Wish’t I wuz a sur“

Wish’t I wus a girl,
All boys good for is’t
Ter carry coal an’ run odd jobs
Au’ git off the walk for dudy snobs
Like I did t’other nite-
Wish’t I wuza gurl!
V‘Vish't I wus a gufl.
. W'ish’t the Lord made all boys gurls. "
An’ made gurls boys tud hen the same
An’ I'd been Lizy Ann by name,
An’ she’d ben John or Joe stid of Jane,
Wish’t he had—
, Wish’t I wuz a. gurll
—Bradford (Pa.) Era.

LIEUTENANT IN LOVE

_ “In love, Lieutenanti". I cried, 819
most starting from my seat, so greatly
had he surprised me.

My Friend Swash generated a great
cloud of smoke in his pipe and it so on-
veloped his head that I could not see
his face, deeply flushed as it must have
been, and from the cloud of gray vapor
came the gruff reply:

“Yes, in love, confound it!”

“Oh, how interestingl” exclaimed my

, wife, dropping her magazine and look;

ing up at my friend and myself, whom
she had always previously declared to
be the most uninteresting when we got
together over our pipes.

It is not very pleasant for me,” mut-
tered Swash. He Was greatly embar-
rassed and fixed his eyes pensively on
the floorf
“Where is her home?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” he answered brusque-
1y. ‘

“Wheréfdoes she live?” muttered my
wife. '

“Don’t know that.”

“Where did you meet her?” said I.

“ Can’t tell you that either, Dockboy.
Don’t think me disagreeable If I
could, I would gladly answer your
questions. Indeed, I wish that I was
able to.”

“Your case is truly a strange one,” I
said. “Is this young woman purely an
ideal, a mental creation of your own?
You have been melancholy enough of
late to have been sighing for something
more material.”

“She is not a mere creation of my
imagination,” replied the Lieutenant
solemnly. “She exists—where I don’t
know. Ilsaw her once a great way off
and she realized all my ideals of the
woman I. would make Mrs. Swash.
And when I saw her, for an instant,
though it was, I cried to myself, ‘Here,
Swash, is the woman you have dreamed
of all these years. That soft, intellec-
tual face those soulful eyes, those belong
to the woman you have been waiting
for.’ Then she was gone, from where
and whither I don’t know, for I can’t
tell where I saw her.” '

“Your case is really most remark-
able,” I said. “Explain. ' Don’t sur-
round yourself with such an air of
mystery. It would relieve you to con-
fide your troubles in us. Perhaps we
could help you.”

“Yes, indeed,” cried my wife enthu-
siastically. Perhaps we can help you.”

Swash started. “Ah, yes! Where

. did I leave oflf‘l Perhaps you can—in-

:....--:«~r-.w

Broadway on the way to my boarding,
' “1t

. said mournfully.

deed, yes.” -

“Perhaps we can assist you,” I re-
peated. .

“I think not, Dockboy,” he said, hav-
ing recovered himself. “For my‘case
is truly remarkable. I have swept the
skies with a telescope and cannot find
her. I have palkcdthfie streets day and
night, scrutinizing thousands of win-
dows and still have not a trace of her.
You see I saw her under the most pecu-
liar circumstanCes‘. but see her I did and
I lost my heart. From a satisfied bach-
elor of 50 I have Ibeen metamorphosed
into a lovelorn, disappointed, unhappy
-—I can’t get a word to fit my case.”

“Your use of a. telescope is queer," I
interrupted. “I have suspected all along
that you saw her In the skies.”

“You have guessed my secret,” he
Inexplicable as it
seems, that is just where I saw her, and
she was not in a balloon, either. This
idea that I, crusty bachelor, that I have
been, am absolutely devoid of sentiment
is incorrect. In my life I have met wo«
men, hundreds of them, many beautio
fnl, many charming, and perhaps not
insensible , to my own good points.
Against them my heart has been proof.
This is not because I am callous to wo-
man’s charms, but because I long have
had the belief that somewhere in the
world one was waiting for me; an ideal.
I pictured- her to myself not in my
dreams, but in my wideawake moments,
as I sat alone with my pipe. At such
times she became so real that she
seemed to be beside me as I smoked; so
real that I almost felt that if I spoke
she would answer, but I was, deterred
from experimenting by the belief that
with such a one silence has more
charms than speech. I have no doubt,
Dickboy, that long before you ever met
your wife you saw her face gazing be-
nignly 0n you from a. cloud of tobacco
smoke.”

"Ugh! cried my wife.
pipes.

“Now it happened that one night”
about a week ago I was walking down

She hates

house,” continued my friend.
seems to me that I had been up here to
see you. . At Fertieth street, as ill-luck
would have it, I ran across one of those
itinerant astronomers who had set up a

’ it

 

 

telescope on the pavement and hung out ~'

a small sign calling attention to the

tact that Saturn and its rings could be.

seen for five cents.

 

Business looked “

dull and [kind of pitied the poor fel‘ ,

 

low. It had never been my fortune to
gaze on Saturn 'and her rings, so I
stepped up, gave him a nickel and fixed
my eye at the end of the instrument.
At first all was blackness. ‘I can’t see
the ring,’ said I. ‘The lens is not ad-
justed,’ replied the astronomer. And

. with that he began to turn a lot of

screws. The blackness gave way to a
hazy, gray light, that I suspected was
from a theatre across the street, but I
said nothing but strained my optic
nerve to makeout the planet. It was
of no use. I withdrew my eye and com-
plained. The astronomer then discov-
ered that the instrument was pointed
wrong, and he looked through it. IOW’
cred one end and gave it a turn.

“My eye was at the instrument again
but no change was visible in the make-
up of the heavens beyond a marked in-
crease of light. Once more I com-
plained, and the man declared Imust
be nearsighted. ‘Look harder,’ he said,
giving the machine a little twist. And

. I looked harder, but instead of Saturn

I - saw clearly a woman— my ideal,
sne whom for years I had pictured in
my smoking moments. There she was,
sitting at a window, one arm resting on
the sill, her hand on her chin, her
eyes looking directly into mine.
Even in the half-light, every fea-
ture’ was clearly discernable; there
was the soft black hair waving
across a white forehead; the eyes, deep
and full of immeasurable good things;
the nose, the mouth, everything that
I had been seeking for. I gave an ex-
clamation of joy.

" ‘You see her now, sir? Do these
rings show up good?’ This remark
from the astronomer brought to mind a
forgotten fact. I saw her through a
telescope; where was that window that
I could seek her out? I had found her.
Better never to have seen her, than
under such appalling conditions. There
she was, gazing calmly at me from the
other end of a long tube. I could al-
most touch her and reached out my
hand.

“ ‘Hold on there!’ cried the astrono-
mer. ‘You’ll upset the machine.’

“My involuntary movement to em-
brace what was not there did indeed
disarrange the apparatus, and so badly
that she disappeared, and where she
had been, a star was winking at me. As
if I cared for stars.

“I paid for five more looks at Saturn.
but could find nothing. In vain
swept the skies, and the housetops
and windows with the telescope, and
with my naked eye. She had vanished.
I went home disconsolate. As surely as
I sit here, Dockboy, I saw her. It was
not a hallucination. She was sitting
ina real window within the range of
that telescope; but where I don t know,
and perhaps never will know. My
ideal has become a reality, but under

what trying circumstances. Do you
wonder that I am miserable?”
“I surely do not,” I said. “If what

you have told is true and not a mere
imagination. ”

“How romantic l” cried my wife.

Lieut. Swash sighed.

Not long afterward my friend and I
were at the corner from which he
had viewed his ideal in the flesh. The
itinerant astronomer ' was there, too,
with his telescope pointed heavenward
in readiness for use. He greeted my
companion pleasantly, and apparently
had been expecting him.

“Maybe you’ll see that planet you’ve
been looking for tonight,” he said.
“I've cleaned off the lenses so they’ll
work better.”

“Planet! Beautiful luminary, ra-
ther,” muttered the Lieutenant, Stop-
ping and screwing his eye into the end
of the telescope. “I can see nothing
but blackness now. Lower the other
end just a little—there.” He began ad-
justing screws with the skill of one ini.
tiated into the mysteries of the heavens.

“Allow me to try the glass,” I said.

“My dear fellow.” he cried. “It is of
no use. “If I can't find it, after search.
ing every night for weeks, you can’t.
There is nothing in sight. It’s only a
question of patience, of waiting until it
again appears.” '3

“Let ma'try,” Igaid peremptorily.

He accededztb my request. With the
assistance of the astronomer I got the
instrument in the desired position,
fixed my eye to it, and focussed it. -

“Pshaw,” cried Swash, impatiently,
“you’re looking right down Broad-

way.” _ .g M, “a... van-v'mn

“Them-'3 . electric lights, sir, not
planets,” ventured the astronomer po-
litely.

These remarks had no effect on me.
I bided my time. At length it came.

“Swash, don’t be excited,” I said;
“but just fix your eye here.”

“It’s her again,” he cried, before he
had his optic thoroughly adjusted.
You’re right, Dockboy, we’ve got her.
Now mark where the telescope points
to. Don’t lose it. Get the direction.”

“Have you read what is below the
window?” said I.

“Jove!” he muttered. “ ‘Miss Maxy
Mumps, the actress, writes: “I have
used Dr. Hoaxer’s harmless hair tonic
and find it perfection.” ’ ”

“We’ve got her, Swash; we’ll spot a
window with that sign— why, confound
it, she’s gone!”

Swash straightened up and seized my
hand.

“Dockboy,” he whispered, so the as-
tonished astronomer could not hear,
“I’ve found her, thanks to you. I can
spot her window by that sign if it’s
within ten miles. ‘Miss Maxy Mumps,
the actress—--’ ”

“Look again,” I said quietly, “and I

tell me what you see.”

Once more he looked, but only for a»:

second.

“Confound it!" he cried.
crazy? I saw a girl on a bicycle and
under it letters saying that if you bike
you should ride a Duster.” ‘

“Gentlemen ” interrupted the astron-
omer, “I’m afraid you ain’t seen Sat-
urn, her no other planet. You was
looking at that advertising canvas way
down Breadvvay.” .. «a...

blast. Swss‘h has gone to the country
for a few dam mum... _.

, ,4

 

“Am I _

1

 

D ' > I
, .
g"'-\. , -. i

,t‘ .

wt E K LY; N 0 KW ALK, — _G A'é-ZE

TINTS TRUE TO LIFE.

COLOR PHOTOGRAPHY AT LAST- IS
'AN ACCOMPLISHED FEAT.

Pictures Made in 1‘! Shades. After Thirty
Years of Experimenting James McDon-
ough Hit on the Secret. Now Backed
by $500,000 Capital.

The results of this long awaited ac-
hievement are not simply garnish reds
blues and yellows. Pictures have been
taken that show seventeen distinct
shades of color. The process was hit
upon overnight. Years of time and
thousands of dollars were spent before
success was reached.

For thirty years James W. McDon-
ough has been laboring in Chicago to
reproduce photographs in colors. Thou-
sands of experiments were performed
till one day, fifteen years ago, he got up«
on the right track. Capital then came
to his aid, but _the successful end was
not yet. at E

Over in Dublin, Ireland, Prof. Joly,
the scientist, was working along the
same line. Success crowned his efforts
a few months ago. He sought letters
patent in London and in Washington.
To his utter astonishment he found Mc-
Donough ahead of him in an applica-
tion for an American patent. Both
men, thousands of miles apart and
working independently, had hit upon
the secret. I

The process requires a specially ruled
screen and specially ruled paper. A
multi-colored screen, ruled by very fine
lines, formed of dots or small particles,
is employed. Fundamental colors of
the spectrum are preferably used for
these lines—say orange red, a yellowish
green and a violet blue.

The screen is ruled with lines in these
colors, about three hundred to the inch.
This screen is placed in front of and in
close contact with an orthochromatic
plate, which is then exposed in the cam-
era to the object to be photographed.
The ordinary black and white negative
is thus obtained in lines corresponding
to the screen in register.

From this negative a positive is made
in the ordinary way on glass or paper.
If now the screen, or a similarly ruled
one, be laid on the positive, and moved
until the positive and screen are in reg-
ister, the picture comes up in original
colors.

Nothing could be simpler. It is only
nature’s method of shading the rose its
delicate pink and the sky its transpar-
ent blue. None of the complicated ap
paratus of cruder methods that have
failed are needed, no adjusting of lights
and no manipulation of colors.

The paper screens are for positives,
the glass ones for transparencies. Se
fine are the color lines on them, and so
perfectly proportioned in shade, that
they show white whenfprinted, just as
the combined colors of the spectrum
are white when properly mixed. '

By it either instantaneous or timid ex-
posures, absolutely perfect in detail
and tint, can be taken. The finished
photograph looks like an ordinary piece
of work marvellously colored by hand;
but, so simple is the process, and yet so
accurate, that it becomes merely me
chanical. ~

Experiments in Cattle Feeding.

The finely finished lot of steers fat
toned at the University State Farm are
now held for sale in dressed form in the
shambles of the Twin Cities. These
animals, some twenty head in all, are
two and three years old respectively,
the major portion of them being nearer
two than three years. The average live
weight was about 1,250 pounds. Some

of them were fed to determine wheth--

er a moderate or a heavy meal ration is
the best in a prolonged period of feed-
ing. Others were fed to show the rela-
tive value of different feeds in fatten-
ing, and yet others to test the value of
oil cake as a finishing food when fed in
large quantities along with ground
corn. . - o
This year it was found again that
steers, fed an average of ten pounds of
meal per day during the entire fatten-
ing period, make as much gain during
the five months of the experiment as
those fed an average of fourteen pounds
per day. m... w.
The feeders of the State use much
larger quantities of food, as a rule;
hence the inference that much of the
food thus use must be wasted. In
other words, w en animals are being

'w-

Ffinished they will take more concen-

trated food than they can properly
digest if it is fed to them. It was
found that a free ration of oil meal and
corn produced extraordinary gains for
a short period, that is to say, for about
seventy days, but that if continued
much longer than the period named the
animals begin to get shaky on their
limbs. In other words, they could not
be carried much longer than seventy to
eighty days without a modification of
diet—Minneapolis Times.

Justified His Slowneu.

An eight year-old San Rafael boy
was being lectured on obedience .one
evening.

“I told you that you could play with

the Wilson boys till 5 o’clock,” said his.

mother. “Here it is seven and you are
just home; why didn’t you come when
i told you; ’

“I did?‘mamma.”

“Don’t tell me a falsehood. Why
didn't you come home at five o’clock?”

"I started home at five.”

“Then you stopped to play on the
way?”

"No, mamma; sure I didn’t.”

“Do you expect me to believe that it
:ook you two hours to walk half a mile?
i think I shall have to punish you for
telling me falsehoods.” . . ‘

"Honestly, I started home at five
J's-look and ‘came straight heme. ”

, The mother _ took the boy into the
rite-hen and ‘took down a whip. He
.ui'ned pale and tears welled up into his
:' '69.

5 ' '-\ DIV,
:‘u:l;':" ,

- l .- es, mamma; Charlie Wilson gave
no a 1.1.1}. .urtle—and .I Was afraid to
nu. ..—-., . led it home.” '

sir, will you tell me the

" '"fi-

 
 

 

 

 

, , Sold by Eisner & casemen-

 

 

SECURED HIS- RIGETS.
How a Drummer Overcamo Several Bull-
road Men.

Because he carried a hundred pounds
of baggage in excess of the amount al-
lowed to one passenger, , a commercial
traveler had an amusing experience
which is described by the Bangor Com-
mercial. The baggage master at a cer-

tainsmall town told him he mustlpay 75
cents to have his extra trunk taken to .

the next statiOn.

The drummer knew this was just 50
cents too much, but there was no time
to argue. He asked the fare to thenext
station. It was 30 cents. He bought a
ticket. |Then he presented his two
tickets, and the baggage master not
very willingly, , checked both of the
trunks. -

While this was being done. the drum-
mer asked if there was any one in._tho
crowd who was going to the next sta-
tion. If so he added, a ticket could he
bought at a discount. He succeeded in
selling his extta ticket for twenty
cents.

This made the baggage master furi-
ous, and when the train came in he in-
formed the conductor that he had ex-
cess baggage and only one ticket. The
conductor then took up the matter;
but the drummer told him that one
ticket was good for one fare and two
checks were good for two trunks, and
he would not pay an excess rate.

On their arrival at Blank station, the
conductor warned the station agent to
see that excess was collected. The
drummer replied that unless those
trunks were delivered to him before the
train started, he would remain on board
go to headquarters and report the case.
He got the trunks.

All She Wanted.

A Scotch woman was returning by
train from a market town, where she
made a few purchases. Just as the
last bell rang a fussy gentleman, ele-
gantly dressed, and with a “mind thy-
self” looking face, rushed into the com-
partment, flung himself hastily into a
corner, pulled out a paper, and pro-
ceeded to devour its contents. Hardly
had he become seated when the woman
timidly addressed him:

“I am very sorry, sir, but——

“I never listen to beggars,” fiercely
interrupted the gentleman. “If you
annoy me further, I’ll report you.”

The 'woman’s eyes flashed, then
twinkled. She said no more, and the
old gentleman retired with an angry
frown behind his paper. "

All went merrily as a marriage bell
until the train arrived at Cromlade,
when the “auld wife” in stepping out
again addressed the churlish individual
in the corner:

“I care na, sir, whether ye report me
or no, but I want that pound of butter
ye’ve been sittin’ on for these last six
mile.”-Cincinnati Enquirer.

On Being Critical. _ ..

It is one of the maxims of the “well
meaning person” that you should not be
too critical. But well meaning persons
scatter their advice recklessly out of the
fulness of a soft heart untempered by
the wisdom of a hard head. True, they
have a habit of hedging their philoso-
phy by a. free use of the adverb “too"
before the qualitive adjectives they
condemn; that that is only for an exit
in case of emergency, as it were. As
we cannot roundly condemn these kind-
ly people, we express our opinion of
them by calling them “well meaning
persons,” who have a habit of confusing
ideas and are not usually quite happy
in the choice of words to express what
they intend. When they say, “Don’t be
too critical,” they mean, “Don’t be per,
petually finding fault in a peevish
spirit.” But when the teacher or
preacher goes astray in his definition, it
is notalways the fault of his hearers if
his doctrine is misunderstood,
He Didn’t Know,

As little Willie finished his prayers
and was about to retire his mother ask-
ed him if he had prayed for everybody.
Replying in the affirmative, the young
one was asked to tell for whom his
prayer had been said. He enumerated
father, mother, brother and sister.

“Haven’t you forBOtteu some one?”
asked his mother, “I.” ---—-rrwm ..

Willie could not recall an omiSsion.

“Just think of grandmother,” ' said
his mother. "She is on the ocean, and
the big ship is rolling on toward home.
Don’t you think you ought to pray for
her safety?”

“For her safety?” exclaimed the
youth, with surprise in his tone. "Why
I didn’t know grandma wanted a bicy-
clel”—New Orleans Times~Democrat

.3; -

Kl“?-

 

 

A Distinction.

Mr. Swift—You told me that this
horse was without fault. but I notice
that one of his eyes is blind.

Dealer—Sure that’s not his fault, sor,
it’s his misfortune. —Vanity.

 

Ungrateful.
Mamma—You know, Johnny, when
mamma whips .her little ‘boybshe does
it for his own good. -
Johnny—Mamma. I wish you didn’t
think quite so much of me'—Tid-Bit.s.

 

Wanted the Date.

Mr. Figg—Tommy, I hear you have
been telling lies. I never told lies when
I was your age.

Tommy—When did you begin, paw?
Indianapolis Journal. -

’5 poems
takes out ink, paint, - ' -’
tar, pitch, grease T.-
and stains from '
clothing and car-
pets quickly'and
completely and q.
Mal-esvaaflin , ‘ ~

——No Acid.— ’10c., 25s.. at Drug

No unpleasant odor. and Dry Goods Stores
Not inflammable. Samples mailed, SC.

I. B. SUTTON, New Canaan, Ct.
M

 
 

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“ I am delighted with IVORINE, also the cake of Olive
Oil Soap that comes in every package.” —Mrs. GEORGE
M. JONES. Providence, R- I.” user-List of Choice Premiums sent Free upon request.
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.. omcs sov LAWYERS.

I’dden Collapse of a Grandlloquent Boast
“by aBuddlng Limb of the Law.

In one of the big down town ofiice
buildings, tenanted principally by law
yers, a Mail and Express reporter rode
down in an elevator car this morning
with two boys, who, to judge from
hair conversation, were budding limbs
of the law. One of them was about 15
years of age, and the other perhaps a
couple of years his senior.

“I had that judgment opened this
morning,” remarked the younger of the
two, flocking the ashes from a cigarette,-
“but I thought Giegerich was a little
slow about it.”

"Ya-as,” drawled the other, “it’s cer-
tainly a great bore to have to spend so
much time in court. Remember my
bond and mortgage case in the Su—
preme? Well, it was enough to try any-
body’s patience. The trouble with some
of our judges, Frank, is that they don’t
know the rudiments -of landlord and
tenant law. I cited Pebbles vs. Bub
bios, and it knocked him out. Where
are you bound?”

. “Oh, I’ve got a little corporation
matter on hand today,” was the reply.
“Receiver wants to be relieved. I don’t
know whether I’ll consent or not. I’ve
got a demurrer to argue besides, and

By that time the car was at the
ground floor. A stout matronly woman
stood waiting to get in. -

“Well, young man,” she said, address-
ing the boy who had been called Frank,
“I was just about to go 'up and give
you a talking to in front of your boss.
Why didn’t you get father’s shoes that
you took to be half~soled.”

“Hush, mother,” whispered Frank,
as his face reddened; “I don’t want to
be talking about that down here. I’m
going to court.” -- .- ’

“You’re going to court, are you?” re-
sponded the stout lady in aloud tone.
"Very Well, go to court, but if you
come home tonight without those shoes
you get no supper and don’t stir a peg
out of the flat the rest of the week? Do
you hear?”

“Say,” said the elevator man as he
stuck his head out of 'the car and
grinned, “you’ve run up against the
Chief Justice of the Supreme Court,
haven’t you? ' Gee-whiz!”

OLDEST JEWELS. IN THE WORLD.

They Decorated the Mummy Remains of
an Egyptian Queen.

The earliest jewels the pedigree of
whichcan be traced, lie in the Museum
of Boolak, Egypt, says the Philadelphia
Press. They belonged to Queen Aha-
hopep, a queen of the eighteen dynasty
in Egypt, apparently some time between
1803 and 1591 B. C. There is, however,
much dispute as to the date of her
In 1859 her tomb was opened by

,' n.-

 

reign.
M. Mariette where it lay in the Valley
of the Tomb of the Kings. "now--

When her coffin was opened a re-
markable collection of precious stones
and jewels was found within.
most important of these was a diadem
of gold and enamel set on the head of
ale queen. This had an inscri tion in
gold on a ground of lapis lazu i and a
sphinx couchant on each side. A small
porcelain cylinder is ornamented with
interlaced lotus flow; in intaglio, and
a gold drop inlaid wit turquoise in the
shape of a fig. To the center of a gold

chain is fastened a scarabaeus of solid

gold inlaid with lapis lazuli, and a
bracelet of quite modern pattern is dec~
orated with figures in repousse, with a
ground inlaid with lapis lazuli.

It is plain from this account that lapis
lazuli was the most commonly used of
the precious stones. It is interesting to
observe that it is also mentioned in Job,
one of the oldest books in the world.
It is probable that the ancients did not
understand how to cut diamonds, ow-
ing to their hardness. dang; J,

MM"! ' ~ *- oo-

’ Her Reason.

The young man picked up his hat and
looked sadly at the lining. .

"There is no hope for me?” he asked
faintly.

"N one whatever,” replied the beauti-
ful girl, her eyes filled with compas-
sxon;

When he reached the door he turned
toward 'her again.

“I have to thank you for one thing,”
he's-aid bitterly.

“What is that?” she inquired.

"You have not told me that you would
be a sister to me.”

“I thought of that,” she rejoined,
hurriedly; “but I suddenly remem-
bered.”

“What?” he asked, shortly, as she
stopped.

“That I promised, this morning, to
marry your father.”—Brooklyn Life.

 

' A Plea for Discrimination.
' He (after the second act) Well, if you
will excuse me, I guess I’ll go out and
get a breath of fresh air.

. She—If it’s the same kind of breath.

that you went-out for when I Was here
with you before, I’d rather you would

' < not bring itin with .you.'—B03ton ”Cou-

 

The'

 

' EASY TERMS.

 

 

FLAGS THAT WILL STAND WEAR.

New Industry Recently Established by an
Illinois Firm. .

The item of the expense of keeping
“Old Glory” floating every day over
public buildings or schoolhouses where
the daily display of the national banner

 

is rendered obligatory is not a. small ,

one.

In East St. Louis, Ill., a company hast,
been formed with a capital of $100,000“
to go into the manufacture of sheet
iron, zinc, and other metal flags. The
material from which t flags now in
use are made is not ve durable, and

in the soft coal burning States of the ..

Union, the banner lasts. at best but a
few weeks, all depending on the weath-
er, and until after a week’s use it be-
comes so dirty as to almost lose its
identity, says the Chicago “Chronicle.”

The Stars and Stripes, duly waving
and apparently fluttering, will be paint-
ed on the metal and then enameled.
When dirty, the flag can be lowered and
washed. Such flags will withstand the
gales which so readily whip those now
in use into ribbons.

Robert Bonner’l Stock Farm.

Mr. Bonner’s farm is on a. plateau
overlooking the Hudson at Tarrytown,
and here he spends much of his time.
He has made a life long study of shoe-
ing, and through his knowledge of foot
balancing, has been able to increase the

-’ speed of horses purchased by him and

to make the lame go sound.

Apparently he is never so happy as
when in the blacksmith shop superino
tending the shoeing of a crippled horse.
He is an expert reinsman, and it is re-
freshing to see him on a summer’s day
in a skeleton bicycle wagon sendinga
trotter at full speed around his track.

The graves of such famous horses as ,

Pocahontas, Rarus, Nutborne, Edward
Everett, Startle, Peerless and Grafton

are within: sight of the track, and con- 2

spicuous among the breed mares in the
pasture is Maud S. and her full sister
Russella. -- ~-'4--WM“‘~

Edwin Forrest who atone time chal-
lenged the attention of the country,
threatening the track supremacy of St.
Julien and even Maud S. is now a com-
mon laborer on the farm. He trotted
a mile to high wheel sulky in 2.11 3-4,

but in July, 1895, in the 24th year of his . '

age, I saw him patiently toiling in
front of a mowing machine. It is bet-
ter for some horses, as it- is for some
men, to wear out than rust out.—"’-Scrib-
ner’s Magazine.

- 1173 u

 

Making Sailing Ships Go Faster.

The statement of an Italian sea cap-
tain that he has proved by experience
that a ship goes faster when her sails
are perforated with a number of holes
than when they are quite sound, wasrat'
first looked’upon as too ridiculous!”
consideration.

howejer that the 1% has gone a long

Way toWard proviugfliircase“ His thew-v
oryis that the forcejof the wind cannot *
fairly take effect on fi'inflated"~sail, bet-t“ 4
cause of the cushion cfdmmovame 'aii; ' -

that fills up the hollow.“ Wfltfifi‘,

To prevent this cushion 68mph "4 his
bored a number of holes in the cal ,
which let part of the wind blew right
through it and allowed the remainder
to strike against the canvas and exercise
its full efieet. Several trials have been
made, and it looks as if another of those
paradoxical truths which appear so im-.
possible on the surface have been seen
through.

The experiments were made in all
sorts of weathers. In a light wind a
boat with ordinary sails made four
knots, while with the perforated sails
she covered five and a quarter knots; in
a fresh breeze she did seven knotawith
ordinary sails, and eight and three.
quarter knots-with the improved s ' ;
in a strong wind she did eight and n .
knots respectively. . _

 

'Best.‘ * ........ .

The Doctor-The trouble with you is
that your brain is overworked.

The Millionaire—What would you ad-
vise, doctor?

The doctor—Well if I were situated as
you are, I’d buy a seat in the United
States Senate. ——Puck.

.c.“ .:.“. '

 

Having a Time.
Wickwire—I see that another police-
man has been suspended for sleeping on

4 his watch. -

Unbelieuernnow find; 3‘

 
 

 
 
 
 
 
 

 

.L...

‘slr'N—-

l

a...

......§ ..

l

T-‘l

l

Mudge—l have been eating and drink- '

ing on mine for a week.

Flifloill

56 YEARS ESTABLISHED.
GRAND AND UPRIGHT.‘
Nearly 100,000 Manufactured. ,3,
_._a___. , -
I EXCHANGED.

 

 

 

 

:' FISCHER PIANO WAREROOMS. “i
lg'gplflhlAvm. cor. lath 8h. ".23 _

Wntefar Catalogue. __~ .

I
' I