I
PUBLISHED EVERY 'I‘UICSDA YMORNING BY
' A. H. BYING'I'ON 8'. (30.,
=-
'
CE
gt gaming glrivapaprr. granted in
gland ileum and gamma, 001ml gutrlligcucc. 120ml
A'I‘ TWO DOLLARS PER ANNUM, IN ADVAN
on, 33300055, gymnasts glutinous, &r.-'--®5talilitlml in 18130.
N UMBER 1014--NEW SERIES.
VOLUME L--.\' UMBER 25.
9239mm ease
nor-{WALK GAZETTE.
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WSINESS, 91353939.--
tenant. M. BULLOCK,
gunmen it: 0011110110 at Elam.
OFFICE: N0. 4 Gazette Building.
' LEWIS F. BEERS,
ginning at gm.
OFFICE OI’PI'SIDOI‘d’S Clothing Store,
SOUTH NORWALK. CONN,
Dr. in. rowxnn nxnon,
I’ll [felon and Surgeon.
iiiicc at the i rug Store of E. Blackmail, No. 11 Main
. "' Street, Norwalk, Conn.
. “.9
w. k. canes. M. 1).,
From the [loyal Opticalmi'c Infirmary, London
‘ 'iiia m 8' menu for the Eye and Ear
3:1!)l fiCiita-‘lirhlilldigmfscs of the Lungs, Fences
’ an nasal passages, also Nervous maladies of
. all 'uds, particularly those affecting females.
in Of Which he has made his specml study, and 5.“:
essful bractiéo more than thirty years. lestunonials
u abundanc of his 511 erior and successful treatment,
an be see at his 0 ice andResidence near the Nor—
valk Hotel, d over Beldcu‘s Tin Store, where he will
is in daily 0 endance, from 0 a. m., to b). p M., 93va
515. Home _cr it is not OAKS, but W. 1.. CAKE... l‘.
Humai.4_,,...L_..,__-_.__.A,.. ._.,_.
'Patent Agency;
WM. VINE,
Agent and Solicitor of Patents,
sillctiANwAL nannonrsunu
‘ AND
MODEL MAKER,
Wiiiuipauk, Norwalk, Conn.
amour courts,
auricular TAILOR.
CURTIS‘S BUILDING Main Street.
y7
Gents and Youfh's Clothing cat and made to or-
ler at short notice, of the best materials, in the la-
:est styles, by experienced workmen, and at rea-
sonable prices. ,
Removal.
0 0 B N W A I. I. ’ S
FASHIONABLE MERCHANT
Tailoring Establishment.
Has been removed to Raymond’s Building, Main
Street, where.
READY MADE CLOTHING
AND
FURNISHING GOODS.
Can be had in great variety, and of excellent quality.
J. U. CAREER,
AGENT FOR
Ilowc’s Sewing Machines,
’l‘iIE BEST MACHINE IN MARKET
r ‘ in' an Shoemakersuso. Call and examine
lfifilll‘laalllly beaconviuccd of' their superiority to all
other machines. L.
G. 8L G. M. HOLMES,
DEALERS IN
Groceries,
Flour,
Provisions, &c.,
Main Street, Norwulk, Conn.
”a. in. Ohms-man a. co,
Wholesale and Retaichalei-s in
Groceries, Flour, Feed, &c.,
14 and 10 Main Street, Norwalk, Conn,
E'I‘NA INSURANCE COMPANY-
Of Hartford.
Incorporated in 1810, Charter Perpetual.
CAPITAL A ND ASSETS, $3.128.820
Insure aoainst loss and (lounge by Fire on Terms
adhptcd to the hazard, anticonsistcnt With
the laws of compensation.
GEORGE R. (IOWLES, Sole Agent, . .
ForNorwnlk and vicunly.
Kiwi—£001: a HOPKINS,—
LIVEBY‘
Sales and Exchange Stables
(1
SOUTH NORWALK, CONN.
_ o_‘ .. . ..:..
FORTY GOOD HORSES for sale cheap as can be
bought in city or country. Also, a few second-hand
Carriages. .
Hopes and Carriages to let at all hours. Carriages
run In all trains and to the Steamboat Coaches for
Weddings. Fillll‘l‘.ll~‘, the,
Wilcox & Gibbs’s
PREMIUM
SEWING MACHiNES.
(f. l‘». D‘AIt'l‘Ol‘i. Agent, for Nurwalk
Instiurll-m :‘th‘ll il' rrqum-ll.
’l‘lle Rallies
Of' Norwull: ‘ll l-guiiig into ruptures about
Coburu’c Washing dz Bleaching Fluid.
It. is just what they have always needed in the laun-
dry. No mechanical agency is necessary with this
Flui-l to make the clothes perfectly clean and while.
Even washing-boards are of no use now. Dirrctions
’SxBridseportJb?
carpets and 7 Pa.
NORWALK, CONN.. 'I‘UES DAY, JUNE 18', 1807.
per Hangings.
INSURANCE COMPANY.
NORWALK, CONN.
CASH CAPITAL, $500 000
PAID UI’ CAPITAL, $100,000
WM. ( ‘. STREET. President.
GEO. It. COWLES, Secretary.
EBEN. HILL, Treasurer.
Keg... over $23,000,000.
GEO. II. COWLES,
SAGEN’I‘ul Norwalk, and issues Policies for the
for the following Insurance Companies.
Home, ol'N. \'., Assets Jan. lst, ’64, $3,M,270
Etna, of Hartford, " “ “ 3,128.8‘20
Phoenix, of N. Y., ‘ ” " 722,210
Home, of'N. 11., v " " 500,
Norwich. “ “ " " 300,501
Lamar, N. Y., " " “ “ 389,375
North American, Hi‘ll " " “ "' 384,010
City of New Haven. ‘ “ “ 330,419
Merchants. Hartford, “ " “ " 301,443
Western Mass..Pittsficld, “ " " 236,424
Ham den. Springfield, " “ “ “ 200,000
Poop c‘s, Worcester, “ “ “ 405,593
and othchompaiiics, Stock and Mutual, in Connecti-
cut. Massachusetts and New York, with assets of
$13,000,000. At So. Norwalk, application may be
made to WM. T. CRAW.
Waterbury & Duncan,
Rear of Not-walk Horse Railway Depot, are
_ _ , ‘ new prepared to execute in the best man-
ger 01:51 with the greatest dispatch, everything in the
me 0
'«u-ngc-mulring and Blacksmithi'ng,
Carriages made to order, and Painting. Trimming
Siophllrllng, 8:0,, done by experienced workmen, with
lspa c l-
BE‘Good (Jurriagc timber taken in exchange for
nor '.
cannula mama
Horse Shoeing lb Black-smithing.
LYON, AHERN, & 00.,
OULD announce to the public that they have ta-
1300 the old stand of Ca t. Henry Lamb. Main
Street, where they are scoured] to execute in the best
manner and greatest isputoh anythin in the above
line. Carriages made to order, and orsc Shoeinv,
Painting, Trimming, Repairing, &c., done by cxpe —
enced workmen with dis tch. 1y44
Anecs'rcs LYON, Vii. AHERN, Cass. Fox-
REAL ESTATE.
For Sale or to Let
AIIOUSE at South Norwalk. near the Depot; for-
merly occupied by Mr. Dickermau. Enquire of
3124 D. R. AUSTIN.
Homestead for Sale.
IIIHE HOMESTEAD of the late John D. Lounsbn-
ry, deceased. situated in Winnipauk, is offered
for Sale. The Dwelling House contains thirteen
rooms. with all modern conveniences. and is very
pleasantly located on the Main Street. There are
etween three and four acres of cod land. with Or-
£21031}; (gardeii, Mfal'lgw, 850i Int-building all in
,. r er. or nr er part cu arse l to MOR-
GAN SMITH, or Miss SARAH A. LIODU’IVSBURY.
at the Residence of Geo. H. Randle, Winnipauk, Ct.
FOr Sale.
ONE of the most magnificent places on West Ave-
nue, onthe hne..of the Horse Railwa , belonglnor
to Mr. A. 0. Brush, which will be sold at a bargain, and
on accommodating terms. Apply to
NASH & IVES,
if 10 No.1, Water St. Norwalk, Ct.
For sale cheap;
SEVERAL ghrticularly desirable buildln lots, but
a short istance from the Brid e. n nire of
‘ A. H. DYING ON.
For Sale.
The place formerly owned and occupied by Isaac S.
Beers, deceased. For furiher particulars ago] to
0‘5 MORGAN '1‘. TH
lfnet soldwithin four weeks, the house will be
rented for the season.
Rare Chance.
TWO first-class Building Lots, for sale on the cor-
ner of Washington and Franklin Streets, front-
lugi on Union Park. They are seventy-five feet wide
an one-hundred and seventy-five deep, with abeau-
11ml grove in front, and an abundance of On: es,
Strawberries and Cherries, in bearing. Conven eat
to the cars, and in a firstclass neighborhood.
January, 5th, 1866. EM E. LYON.
BUILDING LOT, FOR SALE.
BUILDING LOT 70x130 feet situated on Centre
Avenue, for Sale. Enquire of
tf9 A. SELLECK.
Real Estate Agency.
THE subscriber has on his hands, for sale a large
Notice.
’ “HF, subscriber havinv purchased the CLOTHING
a. and GENTS FURNISHING EMPORIUM, of A.
Keeprel, will continue the Business in all its branches
at the old stand, No. 3 Main Street, Norwalk.
_ The public are respectfully invited to call and exam-
ine the large and varied assortment of
. amount of Real Estate, of various klndg, consist-
ing of BUILDING Lore. both in the villa e of South
Norwalk, and on ,the East side of the bar or. “Down
Town” so called. Also. some Store Lots on Wash.
inggon Street, 80 Norwnlk, which is within five years
to seems the great WHOLE SALE anrnnss Smear
or THIS Town.
.Persons wishing to buy. or sell real estate, are in-
vrted to call on the subscriber, at South Norwalk,
Ready Made Clothing,
FRENCH CLOTHS, CASSIM‘ERES and VESTINGS,
which he will make up to'ordcr at short notice and in
the latest fashionable style. E. GUSOWSKI,
1 yin No. 3 Main Street,
Notice.
I III: subscriber having taken the old Horse Shocing
Stand at the foot of Mill Hill, is prepared to do
Horse Shocing and all kinds of job Blacksmithing, on
the most reasonable terms,
110 also carries on the Carriage Business at the Old
stand occupied by his father for the last twenty-three
years. JOHN SHEPHERD, Norwalk. ft35
Greceries Cheaper than ever
I?" 6 R C A S H I
'I‘llE snbscriccr would inform the public generally,
that he still continues to sell the best of Grocer-
ies, Provisions, etc., at his old stand, No. «1 Skiddy‘s
Block,as cheap as thc cheapest. 110 offers great in-
ducenicnts to cash buyers, as he has as large an as-
sortment of groceries of the best qualities as can be
found at any storcin the country. We would invite
which are oftlie very best quality,aud will be sold cheap-
6 DINING SALOON. 6
g at the o
a 037' sters h
A‘s”, :l lil'sl i'l'tss
ISAAC LEE.
2.
the special attention of all to his stock of
The public are invited to calland examine and judge
“NEW YORK HOUSE p
The luvs! nl
‘ BILLIARD SALOON
No. 2.1 Main St. Nurwalk.
COFFEES, TEAS AND SUGARS,
for themselves. A. MOREHOUSE.
Illl'llii Hillilll'i
Meals at all hours. M
in cvmy style.
plWincs, Liquors St Ales. >1
Q attached in the House. 0
Z
l‘vl Puma NT
'ro GBNTLEMEN
w it‘d Saw: a guild
theiri
GENTLE.“ 53‘
(It‘lll
clothes
Cleaned, or Dyedl
of loom-y in having.
in all lastinnnble l'UIUIS, without rip
ping tlil-ni. Also all ulhcl‘ kinds of
Dyeing and Cleaning,
done in the best style at
LOUIS MOEGLIN'S
DANBIIRY DYE WORKS.
Urdcis left wuli II. II. Vv(§lllllflu&00.,
39 Main Slim-l, Nul'wnlk, Conn. 44
DENTISTRY
IN .“OU'I‘II NOHWALK.
DR. KENDALL will continue the use Of
Lauglning Gas,
in extracting teeth as them is no longer any doubt
as to its perfect sa‘cty when administered by a care
ful and ex erlcnccd Physician, lo winch hundreds
in Norwnl can testify. .
He will spend three days each week, IIednes—
day, Thursday and Il'rulaw hereafter. in Nor-
walk, that all who desire his sl-i'viccs may he accom-
modated lint llms'l: who wish tccthcxtractcdare
rcq tested to “all on Wednesday it" possible.
'I‘ecth filled in the latest and most approved
manner, these partially broken away by de-
cay restored to their l'orincrrlze andsbape. .
We are constantly making the best styles ofArtifl-
ciul Teeth and can furnish them at short notice.
Itvioni near the Depot, over Swords‘ (ElotbiugEm-
porimn. '
"To" a, "ENOUD,
Dealers in
. .
Groceries, Flour, Liquors, &c.
Main Slrccl, Norwalk, Conn,
llavinglnullong uxpu-ricucc in the business they
coniill-cnlly rcly ups». [ht-Ir ability to please their
l'ricull- and 0051011101", by fair (healing and swim at-
tmltiou to busiuc- s 111
llanvav r‘i'rnll, Jinx W. RENOUD.
Glorious News.
FLOUR, FEED,
SUGAR, MOLASSES,
BUTTER, TEAS,
ROCK SALT, 100.. cheaper lhan f'\'L‘l‘
Wi- :lrn receiving an entire new supply of
(l i'; (_) (J I". lx’ I I”.
at greatly reduced prices. DOTY & MOItEllOUSE,
H. H. BELDEN,
Westport, Conn.
People’s Store.
DEALER IN
Dry Goods, Beets, Shoes, Clothing,
HATS, CAPS and FANCY GOODS. Our BOOT
nnll SHOE DEl’AIt’I‘MEN'l‘ compliscs over It hun-
dred different varieties. CLOTHING cut free of
expense. Sewing Machine work done at short no-
tice. Goods from Auction every few days. All the
newest styles of Goods in Market constantly on hand
on each Bottle. J. G. LEEDS & 00., Stamford.
Prices nslowns any store in the County. Call
over Tollea a Ely‘s Drug Store. W. T. CRAW.
Norwalk June 31], 1867.
REAL ESTATE,
I'or Sale and to Let.
NUMBER ot Tenement Houses for Sale and to
Let. Six first-class houses for Sale or to let
four of them furnished; three small houses for sale
to be moved ofi'; also a number of builuing lots for
sale. Four farms andaqnautity of wood land for
sale. All 0fthe above will be sold on accommoda-
ting terms. Appiy to . . WOOD‘S
8*‘20 Employment Ofiice.
NASH sic IVES.
REAL ESTATE AGENTS
No. 1 WATER STREET.
ROPERTY Bought, Sold, Exchaugcd or Let, on
reasonable terms. We have a good variety of
desirable Houses and Farms in and out of town for
sale on accommodating terms.
WM. R. Nasu.
132
NATHAN Ivns.
J". FERBIS,
REAL ESTATE AGENT,
50 Estates
Oil SALE in Norwalk and vicinity, from 1-4 to
200 acres, with buildin s thereon, price from
W50 to $100,000. Also, T0 ET. furnished and un-
urnishcd houses. Addriss J. FERRIS. at Tollcs &
Ely’s Drug Store, South Norwalk. Notice for sur.
veying may be left at the Gazette Ofilcc.
BUILDING Lars,
F o R s A 1.. 1::
gEVERAL very eligible building lots for Sale, in
L the immediate Vicinity oft c Brid 0, others
more remote. Three acres ofunimprove land pleas
antly located, for sale at a bargain. A house and
five acres ofland, ditto. Apply to A. H. BYINGTON
FLOUR, FEED and GRAIN
At Wholesale.
1113 subscribers having taken the stole in James‘s
building, Water Street, just above the store of
Wm. O. Street, are now prepared to furnish Flour,
Feed and Grain at wholesale, at the lowest market pri-
ces. They solicit, and will endeavor to merit liberal
patronage. H. & I. SELLECK.
HENRY Summon, (1?) Isaac SELL‘ECK, JR.
THE PROPRIETORS OF THE
N orwalk Grist and Flour Mill,
continue to sell all kinds of
GRAIN, FLOUR and FEED,
in quantities and at prices to suit purchasers.
Grist work promptly attended to. Cash paid for
Grain. MILLS d: WHIPPLE.
Temperance Dining Saloon.
AT THE OLD SPRING STAND.
JULIUS F. PARTRICK. having taken the above So-
loon, recently kept by Mr. Chas. H. Byxbec. is now
prepared to furnish hot meals, at all reasonable
hours. Oysters Stewed Roasted. Fried, or on the
shell; Fulnllles or Parties supplied; also, shipped
in kegs to all arts of the country.
Home made ten and Cake constantly on hand.
Ale drawn fresh Dom barrel-no poisonous lead pipe
used. No Liquors kept.
Saloon 0 en from 6 a. In. to 11 o’clock p. m.
Closed on undays) Private Dining Room for La-
es, entrance under J. F. Bonnet s Store. Gent‘s
entrance under Carler‘s Shoe Store. 16
.. HOME AGAIN.”
COAL! COAL I I COAL I! !
AT
Steamboat Dock,
SOUTH NOiiwALK.
HE subscribe having resumed his old business as
above, is prepared to furnish the public With a
better article of COAL, than has ever before been
offered, and at the lowest possible rates. Also,
WOOD,
of all descriptions. [18] DAVID ll . WEBB.
H. M. 8:. J. T. PRO‘VIT'I‘,
No. 33 and 37 Main Si.., havcjustrcccivcd a full lus-
sortinent of
Wall Paper,
which they oil‘crat very reasonable prices. Please
call and examine the Stock. Paper hung if desired
at short notice,
Hammer’s Champagne Ale.
fI‘I-IE attention Ofthc public is solicltcdlu ,lhc sn-
pcrior q an) if; of
u A M M E 11' S
Fresh Brewed Champagne Ale.
This Ale is brewed fresh at. all seasons of the year
and its keeping qualities, especially of that brew
during the most excessive hot weather, is guaranteed
for any lenght of time.
For sale in Barrels and Half-Barrels. at Selleck‘s
Pocket Oilil'c, Norwalk.
J ElIIEl. (lRUMAN.
Agent for the sale of Iliiinmcr‘s Champagne Ale, Wil-
’ ton, Conn. , 2
' natal. Machine Shop.
HE subscriber would respectfully inform Manufac-
turers and others using Machinery, in Nor-walk
and vicinity, that he is rcparcd to do all thin s per-
taining to a general mac iiiie shop. All orders or the
making or repairing of every descriptionpf Machinery
attended to with romptncss lfiv experienced work-
men. Having ad ed nSteam 13,7100 (in addition to
water powc? to his works, he utters himself he is
well preparer to do all kinds of work at very short
notice. . ISAA CH Jn.
Machine Shop just back of the Post Office and Horse
Railway Building. 11
SOmething New.
ND at the same time the most ornamental Pur-
lor Stove cvcr exhibited in this place made or
Soap stone and us flnely pollishcd as the finest maf-
ble. Both ornamental and useful. Examine them.
and see.
C. & E. K. LOCKWOOD 9% CO."
'3H40rse Cars run right by the
Bounties, Pensions, ac.
HAVING just discovered that there has been a
report widely circulated that I have given it
the United States Claim Agency business, whic
has been believed by some. I would here state to
all persons interested that I am fully prepared and
wil attend to the collection of claims against the
United States Government, the same as heretofore.
I am also fully prepared to make out up lications
under all the late Acts of Congress respect in; equal-
ization of Bounty, increased ensione, &c., arc.
1m WM. T. BARNUM.
Danbnry, 1367. -
Fruit Trees! Fruit Trees! l
AT THE
NEW C‘NAAN NURSERY.
The subscribers eke pleasure in announcing to the
public that their stock of
Fruit 6; Ornamental Trees, Vines, the.
is unusually large and of unsurpassed excellen'be.
We feel confident in saying that we believevthet our
stock of AP PL Cl! 1 -) irt icularly, to be the Lur-
gest and Best in this Country. We are also positive
that we can furnish Trees in better quality. better
order, and for LESS MONEY than they can be obtained
from distant Nurseries.
Those wishing to purchase Trees end When will do
well to send their orders early—or still better, visit
our Nursery and make their own selections. -
STEPHEN HOYT & SONS.
P. s. We take pleasure in showln pe‘rlbns through
our Nurseries, whether desirous o p ‘ ing trees
erect; and would cordially-invite a] 1' interested to
visit the Nursery.
TH Subscribers havin be lit out MILE L.‘
HENDRICKS, Shoe tore, y’s Block, South
Norwalk, would respectfully call the attention of the
public to their
NEW STOCK 0F. GOODS,
consisting of a general assortment of
which will he sold very low-for _
C A. S E -
BROWN & STEVENS.
HIRAM s. naowu. nanvnv s'rnvans.
N. B. Havin" rctnrncdto South Norwalk, to my
old standeonId respectfully invite my friends and
former customers to give ans acall at Ely’n Block.
cor.
HARVEY STEVENS.
Double root-Power. Pump.
Patented Aug. 9th 1864 'R.» 'vwedJau. 1,1865
The best recommendation for labor-saving machines
in this age of inventions is thul Ihey prove well.
This machine umps from in 1032 gallons per
minute, they ares mple,dur.-. on... work very , and
do not freeze. Being niadr as wood they are not 11-
able to corrode, rust. or III any we impart an un-
pleasant-flavor; and can be repuil'c at a trifling ex-
ense. Samples of this Pinup can be seen at the fol-
owinv places; South Norwulk I’lanlngMill; near
the I otel in Westport; at E. Raymond's lace,
Cranberry Plain,arid at Cyrus Morgan’s North ilton
Manufactured and sold by
Z. M. COMS’I‘OCK, South Nor-walk.
All orders promptl attended to when acconi -
nied by the eptbo the well, measuring from 0
platform down. , ~ .
CORRECTIONE I!
CHOCOLATES £5 CAROMELS.
TAPPA‘CANDY,
I
BALSAM TOLU DROPS, also;
GENUINE MOLASSES CANDY.
made fresh every day. Tonether with a general as-
sortmentof American audi‘rench Confectione , at
D. DAYTON S. ‘
N. B.—0YSTERS Stewed, Roasted or Fried, to
suit, at short notice. Openedoyaters by the qfiart
or gallon, at the old stand, Ely’s Bl ick, South or-
we .
Notice.
HE subscriber can furnish the Ladies of N orwalk
with all styles and varieties for the season of
Bonnets and Jockeys,
forlhe old and young, and with prices to suit the
times. Allkinds of
HATS SEWED OVER,
and new ones made to order. I am confident that
with my new and improved process of
Bleaching '
that I can ive entire satisfaction.
Ladies g ve me a call at the old stand foot of Mar-
shall street, South Norwalk,
GILES HAU LENBEEK-
N. B.—Tuscans, Panamas. ng’horns, Neapolitans.-
and all kinds of Braids,Bleach , , Pressed and Dyed,
Spring Styles
MILLINERY and FANCY GOODS
For 1807. MISS S. A. BEERS, would respectfully an-
nounce to the citizens of Norwalk, that she has taken
the store in Wood’s Building, Main St., formerly occu-
pheud by Mrs. Duff, and will carry on the business of
incl-y. She haenlso a good variety ofFoncy Goods,
Corsets, Hosiery, Dress Trimmings, &c., and Will do
all kinds of Machine Stitching. Gents ~ and Ladies
under Cements made to order, She has also 'a. large
variety of handsome tterns for Stamping Braiding
and Embroideriug, w ch she will do to older at short
notice. A share of the public gone 0 II solicited.
1y15 — MISS S. A. BE RS, orwalk, Conn.
Millincry and Dressmaklng,
Mrs. B. LAMINCE,
OULD inform the Ladies of South Norwalk and
_ vicinity that she has taken the stand formerly
occu led by Mrs. Newcomb, Washington Street,
Sout Nor-walk where she will continue the MIL-
LINERY and DRESS-MAKING Business. Ladies
are invited to cell and examine her assortment of
Spring Goods. . hands
A. Jackson & Ill-0.,
No. 1, Gazurrn BUILDING,
OULD invite the attention of their old custom-
ers and the public generally to their varied and
extensive stock of
WATCHES, annnnv, SiLvnn Wane, FAN-
cv Goons, SILVER PLATED Wane, «kc,
which was selected with great care and in not'to be
surpassed in Fairneld County, in quality or price.
Constant additions are made of all the latest I 100
of goods. A. JACKSON «k BR .
3mm ELLIOTT. _
Practical Watch-maker lb Jeweller,
MAIN smear, wns'rronr, CONN.
~ ‘,,_ Dealer in Americeu,English.and Swiss Watch-
SJ es,AmerIcan Clocks,Jewel Plated Were, the
- blade to order.-l:lalr Work, ngrnved and En-
amels Silver, Silver Forks.Spoons, Napkin Rings,
&0. Also, Silver Plating, Galvanizing and Fire Gild-
ing done in the best manner. Strict attention paid
to the repairing of Chrouometor, Dufil‘ex an Lever
Watches, French and American Cloc , Jewel and
Musical Boxes. All work warranted. Ra frond
time by Regulater. . . , .
I I I
Wagon-making, Blacksmithmg, 6w.-
ElE subscribers are carrying on a general Wagon
making, Blacksmithlng and Repairing Shop.
in the Capt. Merritt, Building, a ew rods above
Leonard‘s Coal Yard. where the will be glad to
execute all orders in theii‘line, w th promptness and
at moderate prices
LOCKWOOD & BEERS.
4m*
THE OLD BRIDGE BARBER SHOP
GAZETTE BUILDING.
The undersigned would respectfully inform the
public that he will continue the business of
Shaving and Hair Dressing,
Ham Corrine, Snamoonve, &c., &c., ac"
at the old stand Gazette Buildin , and trusts that a
close attention to the wants ofh s atrons will en-
sure him success. Helms able an capable assis-
tants from New York and is repurcd to attend to
all at short notice. Private 01 for Ladies.
Schaub‘s Rxonnnm'ron and Macro Fnum, both
excellent articles, constantly on hand
GEORGE SCHAUB.
Net-walk, Jan. 28th. ~
“surmount noon,"
I C E 2 '
1AMILIES,Snloons, Stores, Meat and Fish Mar-
]! kets. &c., supplied with good Ice, in any gun“.
t Orders mayibe left at the
R. [LB 0 SON.
,.on reasonable terms.
ner-rs Orrrcn.
(low for Sale,
VERY Superior Milk and Butter Cow, young and
just come in; ct bcsts‘tock'ever Owned in this
County. Priée $100; Enquire atthls office. ' 3t2'3
Boots and. shoes!“
’ For the Gazette.
True Love.
To wonder why you'er feeling so.
And yet you cannot tell ;
To rather like the feeling tho‘,
Nor care to broke the spell.
To sit and hold a hand for hours,
A single word not say;
And pleasant thoughts have pleasant powers,
i Which hold a pleasant away.
To feel nshanied, yet all the while
You cannot tell for what;
’l‘o catch occalionally a smile.
And feign you saw it not.
To look right down upon the floor,
AI if in pensive thought, .
And thinkion what's been said before.
And wonder if you ought.
Ought P—ycs, indeed l —’lis love most true,
You nevi-r need mistrust-
And when you have such fellings, you
Know what is Cupid’s thrust. .-
Brooklyn, June 3, 1867. _
A.....>..._ ._..—
TlII- Union Pacific .I'Inllroad
lrunl Omaha. Nebraska.
Wu vr use new noun AND warm IT WILL
' an entrance. ,
began about
.—- :
No great enterprise was ever
has been done. The'public have a vague,
idea'that a railroad is being built fromreome~
where in the East to somewhere in a further
laid ; but will-fell. begins, or What route- It
follows, or whore-it is mood, “is venture to
one“, not one in n thunsundrcun tell. . ,-
For a d: zen years we have heard that a.
great Pacific Reilmad was to be built, and it
dozen names and a dozen companies, and a;
dozen renteseimm‘tbe southern . boundary»‘
of Texas to-liie mirthem lmnndaty of Lake ‘
Superior—hove been urged upon COngress'
lathe , test and best means for uniting?
the At nude and Pacific shorts. .Bubble' of;
tor buble was blown, and each bumble turn;
when touched by the sharp point of; practi;
cal experience: : -
The absolute neecessity for a
Pacific Roll]
, road to retain and bind more closely g-togel-h- ,,
er the eastern and western extremesof, the ,
continent in one great, United _ond;;1?ocofle
country, the immense cost ofgovernment
transportation. to Its ‘ frontier andafiocky
Mountain posts, and the even grandam!!! of
, Indian won, in a region that, nothing but a
railroad could civilize,_and nothing but civ-
ilization, could pacify—the greatest. Impor-
tance ofopenlng a, road to the rich gold and
silvermlnes of them! and Sierra :Neva:
do Mountains, so that the-way to , the. re;
sumption. of Ipecie pa ants might be magic:
shortened easier, 0 l' of the“ What
reasons finally pressed withneh weighing
on Congress, that It determln, 0011181111110“?
should be made. There were, indeed .mil'w .
others: We thousand miles ofendditiow-l
territory would be opened for 60119391119”;
vast bodies of land now voiceless Wollld be,
made productive; the tide of Muses and
travel that now winds andhuiud danger,
one way along the borders of two oceans
would be increased ten-fold : and how
would the fathers in the East strike hands
with theirsons and daughter! It the Golden
Gale, if’they could only be 'bomo on the
wings of the locomotive !:
The imperative need of the work was ad-
mitted, butit wanton vast for individual 00-:
terprise to, attempt. No combination of ri-,
vate capitalists was willing to risks! red
million dollars in the construction 0, . 2,000
miles of railroad through a wilderness. As
the undertaking was slrickly national, so no
power less than that of the nation Was suffi-
cient to accomplish it ; and large as the cost
neccessarily Would lir, uw expenditure would
save a much gleeItl‘l lost in the country,“
But the GOVCI‘lllllt'lil (llll not wish tn enter
upon any new system I. internal in: “'00!!-
ments on its own :u-uunm pond uson.y alter-
nalive was 1.. yum is .mi in the mu-l. ca‘re-
ful manner in touch responsible indiv duals of
suitable character and energy or might be
willing to risk a poivi- n of in. ir private
means in'the construction 01 the read.
'rnn COMPANY’S cmn'rnn AND noun.
This charter was granted and perfected by
various acts of Congm», and the Company
integrity, wealth, and business experience.
Among the officers are Gn-iicral John-A. Dix,
President, Thomas O. Durant, Vice I’l‘f'sh
dent, and Hon. John .1. Olsen, late assistant
Treasurer of the U. 8., Treasurer. .
The Capital authorized by the Charter is
One Hundred Million Dollars, of Which it is
estimated that not exceeding Twenty-Five
Millions will be required, and of winch‘f'iye
Millions have alreadytten paidginy , ::«
= Surveying parties were at once pushed.
' out in vitrious‘ directions acrost the continent
to find and locate the best available line be-
ttveei'i the Missouri River and [homicide
Oct-on. This was established'al Omaha; in-
Sau Francisco, in Collin-ole, on the~ west—n"
distance of nearly 1,900 unites. The Chicago-
and North Western flailioad is new comple-
ted fr -m Chi o to Omaha, 0 distance of
40: "nice; on several uiiier roads are, rep-
iul’, building to unite with the Union Pacif-
ic at the same point ; sutha iteeasteru con-
nections will be clinicians and complete.
The general line of the road from Omaha
is west up the Vullw y «I the Great Platte, and
thence across vln- idem? a distance of 517
miles,10 the Black Hills, or easterlyapur of
the I ocky Mountains. 00'. ‘Bfethr,gllie
Consulting En ‘neer, reports that the 3 grade
is much more vora'blethen', was anticipa-
ted'—.—the maximum futile mimic-lamina,
not exceeding 30 feet to themile, and from
that point to the summit,”0r,-divide of the
continent, it will not exceed 80 feet '10“ the
mile; _'Fiom the Rocky. Mountains. the best
practicable route ‘willbe‘ token toGreht— Salt
Lake City,‘and thence by the Valley.“ the
Humboldt River,.to the eastern base of the
Sierra Nevada, Mountains. The Central Pa-
cific Railroad is new being rapidly built out
from Sacramento, Cal, and is already com-
pleted about 100 miles, and willconneet with
the Union Pacific.
wna'r‘uas nann'noun asp ITS‘OOS'I‘.
As we remarked before, there has been
Very little iall:,and a great deal of work.
Almost before the public were aware, it bad
teen begun. On the First of'JenuIr , 1867,
the Union Pacific Railroad was fimued for
305 miles west from Omaha, and fully equip-
red with Locomotives, Rolling Stock, Repair
on: ps, Depots, Stations, &c.,—and the Conn
pally have on hand Iron, Ties, and other ma-
t.-riiils, sufficient to finish the road to the
lifbl'k) Mountains, or 517 miles from Omaha
by line lll'stof September, 1867. It is expect-
ed lllullllv whole line through to California
will be completed in 1870. .
The first 305 miles were graded, bridged
anti ironed, with a heavy T-rail, 9nd sup-
plied with suitable Depots, Repair shops,
stations, Locomotives, Cars, and all the nec-
essar appurtenances of a first-class road,
for 0 0,000 pei mile, and it is believed that
the iemaining pmtion will not increase the
aVcruge cost In more than $66,000 per mile,
exclusive of equipments,
means ron cous'ruuc'rlon'.
When the Government determined that
llu- road must be built. it also determined to
make the most ample provision to render
its speedy construction beyond a doubt.
let—THE GRANT OF Mount—The Gov-
ernment issues to the Company its Six-per
Cent, 'l‘hirtliy year bonds at the rate 01310,-
000 per mile for the whole road, and in addi-
liun, 101' 150 miles across the itecky Moun-
Iuius 'lns profit. is Irebled, making it 318,1“)
prl‘ mllc'. and from the ti-rntmaiiun of this
section lo the Calilomia mm ( u. m 998
mill is.) the grant is doubled, hulking $03.0 .0
per nnh',--llie whole amount being $14,208
.— ‘ It has been proved, already. that the entire in-
tore-t on the fifty millions in bonds advanced by
the Government will be saved more than twice over
in the consequent diminution of Government expen-
se: in the regions through which the road pulse.
which so little has been said’and so much? ‘
West than n rail-track has ever: before been
- U. S. Bonds, equal to money,
First Mortgage Bonds,
‘Iland grant, 20,032,000 acres, say 30,000,000
comprises men of the highest reputation for '
Nebraska, on the east, and ~will fiddly be It I
000. These bonds are issued by the Gov-
rrnment only on the completion of each sec-
tion of twenty miles, and alter the Commis-
sioners appointed by the President of the
United States have certified that it is thor-
oughly built and supplied with all the ma-
chinery, &c., of a first-class railroad. The
interest on these bonds is paid by the U. 8.
Treasury, and the Government retains as a
sinkiugfund to be applied to repayment of
principal and interest, one'half. the regular
charges made for transportatiOn by the Com
pany against It. These bonds which aresec-
ond mortgage, are not due Tehthirty years,
and it is not improbable that the value of the
services to be rendered to the GOvernmeut
during that period will constitute a sinking
fund sufficient for their redemption at me-
turity.‘ .
pd."+,'1‘int Fms'r MORTGAGE Bonus—The
Offlrnment permits the Company to issue
it owhzflorlgng'e Bonds at the same time,
Mid 99.1918 some terms, and for the some
amountsnd by special Act of Con ress these
bonds of the Company are me e a Fire!
Mortgage on the entire line and property of
the road, the Government Bonds being sub-
ordinate. The amount of these bonds to be
issued by the Company is ‘ limited to an
amount equal to those issued by the Govern-
ment to aid in the construction of the road.
Bd.-—Tnn LAND Gamma—While this is
certainly munificent, at the same time it, is
most advantageous to the Government, for
without it, all its own lands would remain.
almost worthless. It is a donation of every
alternate section fox-'20 miles on each side of
the ; road, or ‘ 12.800 ' acres per mile, and
amounts to 20,032,000 acres, assuming the
distance from Omaha to the California State
Line to be 1.505 miles. Much of this land
especially in the Valle of the Great Platte,
iso rich niggvluritlhn‘l‘i) ‘ie ~coiisild‘elred equal
Johny-m wot ,, . rectum purposes.
Han. E. 1). Mansfield, the learned Commis-
sioner ‘o’f Statistics for the State of Ohio, cs-
_~timateovthnt’nt least 9,400,000 acres will be
available to the Company within a moderate
length of time,aud that it is farwithin bounds
~tt- estimate this entire grant at $1.50an acre,
or $80,000,000. The Illinois Central has re-
alized more than four times this sum from a
similar grant. ‘ '
'RECAPITULATION or timer-0R 1,565 MILES
$44,208,000
44,208,000
$118,410,000
-—-eqaal to a cost of nearly $76,000 per mile,
’which is believed to be a liberal estimate.
This does not take into the account the val-
ue of the right of warned material, the stock
subscription already paid in or to be paid in
the luture, m the present discount at which
the bonds are offered, as they are expected
scan to be at par.
The Interest on the Bonds is more than
provided for by the net earnings of the va-
rious sections of the road, as they are Com-
pleted. On the 305 miles on which the cars
are now running west from Omaha, the re-
ceipis for the firs‘ two weeks in May were
$113,000; and as the road is extended tO-
wards the great mining centers, the business
in freight and passengers constantly increases
-—and as there can be no competition from
rival roads, the Company has full power to
charge renumerative prices.*
PROSPECTS FOR FUTURE BUSINESS.
It needs no argument'to show that the
traffic of the only railroad connecting the
Atlantic and the Pacific, and passing through
the great mining region, must’beimmcnse.
Although our annua! product of the pre—
cious metals is now officially estimated at
$100,000,000 per annum, a vastly greater
sum will be obtained as soon as the Union
Pacific Railroad Opens the way to the gold-
en regions of the Rocky Mountains. Now,
the diflicullies and cost of communications
are so gloat, that none but the very richest
veins can be worked : but. with cheap trans-
portation, hundreds of thousands of hardy
miners will successfully develop other mines,
that, with less costly working, will be more
operation ; and the business of this constant-
ly increasing mining interest must pass over
this road. -
The records of our shipping oflices show
that not less than 50,000 passengers now an-
nually travel by ten between the Atlantic
ports and San Francisco; and theseqeck'on-
ed at $150 each (about one half the steamer
price) would produce a revenue of $7,500,000.
Toe overland traVel is even greater. In a
single year, twenty-seven thousand teams,
comprising a vast number of emigrants and
tram-lore, departed from twu points only on
the Missouri River, on their westward jour-
ney. If the truth of this statement was not
familiar to all frontier’s-men, it might well be
questioned. But, estimating the overland
through travel at the some figures as that by
steamer, and we have $15,000,000 as the min-
,imtltn'csllm'ute on the same number of pas.
~83ngers.
But the facilities for cheap and
rapid transit furnished by railroad always
vastly increases the amount of travel with
tiresome population. The difference be-
tween the numbers who would take an ocean
steamer or a prairie wagon and a modern»
palace car, with its luxurious state rooms,
where the traveler cats and sleeps almost as
comforlably as at home, may be as great as
the difference between the numbers who Were
jolted over the mountains in an old fashion-
ed stage coach and those in an Ex ress train.
between any two great cities. hen, is it
not safe to say that this through travel will
be at once doubled 0n the completion of the
read in 1870, and, with the rapid increase of
Pacific Coast population in ~ the next few
years, more than quadrupled? Is it at all
- extravagant to assert that the through passen-
ger business during the first year alter the
first train of cars runs from Omaha in Ne-
braska to Sacreinento, will be worth twenty-
five llIlIlOu dollars? When to this we add
us much more for its way passenger business,
and more than as much more than both for
its lreig , expressess and mails, etc., are
there not the best reasons in the world for
believing that the Union Pacific Railroad
will be one of the most profitable as well as
one of the grandest works 01 modern times?
THE SECURITY AND VALUE OF ITS BONDS.
We havo made these calculations that. the
public may have some brief data off'acts from
which to form their estimate of the value of
the Union Pacific Railroad Company‘s First
Moltguge. Bonds. Besides, "men of the great-
est railroad experience in the country have
shown their confidence in the stock by liber-
ordioale to all other claims. But there are
stronger proois'ol thc srcurity and value of
the First Mortgage Bonds-than any we have
named:
I That for si'lcty of the country as well as
national ccuuoni, the road is indispensable.
2 That by an investment of about. filly
millions in a Second Mortgage on the road,
the Cuvuumcnl practically guarantees the
principal and interest on the First Mortgage.
The rmnpuny now offer a limited amount
of its First Mortgage Bands, bearing six per
cent. linen sf, payable sum-annually in coin,
at ninety per cent. This interest, at the cur-
taut rate of premium on gold is equal to
nine per cent. per annum on the price for
which they are now Offered. The Company
expects to sell but a small amount at this
rate; when the price will be raised, and like
all similar bonds they will finally raise pre-
mium above their par value. The subscri-
bers in the loan Will not only have the ad-
vantages of very liberal interest and ‘ve'ry
safe security, but will also have the satisfac-
1100 of buying assisted in the construction
of the greatest national Work of the country.
t The price of freight by teams from the Missouri
River was formerly twenty-five cents per pound, or
w per ton.
—‘-——-O-<‘.>u
—'I‘he Ohio papers tell of a young couple
out lliere who planned an elopemenl, the
irl dee‘cenoing nom her room upon the tra-
itional ladder, but at the gate they were
Incl. In the lmher ul'uln- girl on i o Ill-Hither,
by w..o.u, the young cutiplv Wl'lccscnl‘lud to
the parlor, where to tiicirslnpiist- they found
all their relatives collected for the marriage
Kceremony, which took place at once, 0
profitable than the average of those now in ‘
al subscriptions, and this stock must be sub- ‘
CONUNDRUMS.
Geo. Wakeman, in the Galaxy, has a long
article on conundrums, from which we copy
the following:
Let me begin at the beginning, and illus-
trate some methods of constructing, conun-
drums. The student should commence on
the alphabet. The best letter is t. For in-
stance: Why is the letter alike dinner?
Perhaps you give it up. The triumphant
student answers, Because it comes before 1.
Here is one more ingenious on account of
its associations: Why is china called the ce-
lestial land ? Because a little tea (t) makes
an immortal life out of an immoral one.
The practical hand can make these at the
rate of one in thirteen seconds. Thus: Why
is a a strong letter ? Because it is always in
health. If the alphabet were alive, why
‘wOuld you find it difficult to kill it? Be-
cause you could not put b out of being.
Why isa a fortunate letter? Because it is
always in luck. You will perceive that the
whole alphabet can be used in the last form.
L, u and k the same as c, and the other let-
ters in this manner: Whyisa an unfortu-
nate letter? Because it is always out of luck.
Alady asks a gentleman, to whom she is
enga%d, Why is d like a ring? He gives it
up. . ecause we can’t be wed without it.
Why is d likely to be drowned? Because it
isunder the sea. Why is i the happiest of
vowels ? Because it is always in bliss, while
0 is in hell, and the others are always in pur-
gatory. Again, you can use a form like
this: Why will a be long remembered by
Americans ? Because it is the beginning of
secession and the end of Jeff. Davis. These
conundrume are easily made and inimitable,
but they are only to be uwd by beginners, or
for the sake of variety. There are several
other methods for beginners. Take the nu-
meral adjectives. What word is that of five
letters from which, it you take away two of
them, only one will beleft? St-one. What
word is that of eight letters from which, if
you take away five, ten will still be left?
Ten-dency. If you look in the dictionary
you will find about a hundred words begin-
ning with the syllable “ten,” all of which
yen can turn into conundrnms as fast as you
can talk. There are any number of puzzles
to be made on the principle used by Artemus
Ward of putting the figure4 for the word
“for." That is not nearly as ingenious as
the children's method of spelling potatoes—
put one 0, put two 0’s, put three o’s, put four
o’s, put five O‘s, put six 0’s, put seven 0’s, put
eight 0’s. But to illustrate: What day in
the year is an injunction to go forward?
March 4th Why is wealth like aproblem
in figures ‘3 Because it is something to sigh
for (cipher). Similarly with punctuation, as
in the phrases " pulling a period to your ex-
istence," “ putting a stop to a woman’s
tongue." 1 eren have conundrums in which
-comma is twisted into come-ma, and colon
into coal-on. There are other methods
which I cannot stop to consider; as, what
word is always pronounced wrong? Why.
“wrong," of Course. What word is pro-
nOunced quicker by adding a syllable to it?
Quick, &c. '
The student must next open his spelling
book at the list of Christian names; then
turn t0 the dictionary. He will find words
commencing with such syllables as Ann,
Allie, Abe, Ben, Bill, Bell, Carrie, Dan,
Dick, Della, Ella, Emma, Olive, Ollie, Jen-
ny, Poll , Minnie, 6270. Then go to work
thus: Wyhat lady should he loved by the
Irish? Amelia Ration. In the same way
use Ann '1‘. Diluvian, Dick Tater, Ollie Gar-
cby, Sail Ladd, &c. There are some intense-
ly depraved people who even think it is fun-
ny to cell suicide susan-sidc. Again, why
uretbe Marys the most amiable of their sex?
Because tlit-y can always be Molly-fled.
When is Mary uOt'u dis-syllable? When
you change it to u. Polly-syllable. Several
hundred such conundrums can be made as
Just as a short-hand reporter can take them
down. Sometimes it litt.e extra thinking
will develop a new one not already obtained
in the dictionary, as when you say that Jen-
ny Rosity is a benevolent lady.
Take your dictionary again, commencing
at Ab. When is a man not. a man? VVheu
he is a-bed. Follow the letter a clown, and
you will find any number of similar conun-
drums. Here is one apropos of‘ships. When
isa fortune like an appendage to a vessel?
.When it is amassed (a mast). Why is a
sailor never a sailor? Because he is always
asboaru or a—sliore. NeVer despair of any
Word. Can you make one on “ assist?"
Listen: Why is a benevolent landlord who
lowers his tenant’s rent like a man who
draws upa new code of philosophy? Be-
cause be reduces it to assist him (a system).
Look at such words as abandon, abet, abili-
ty, abreast, accord, accosi, account, acquaint,
acquire, acquit, adrift, again, announce, an-
neal, annex, abate, aciostic, acute, adore,
afoot, afire, ahead, amass, amaze, amuse,
upuce, apparent, apparition, appeal, appear,
appoint, aroma (a _roamer), assent, ussign,.
aversion, avow, avoul, award, awry, &c. In
the list of a you may sometimes make a co-
nundrnui by ustng the syllables an, as, are.
Go entirely through the dictionary in like
manner; you will find words commencing
with such syllables as bee, slay, sin, die,ear,
for, gal, his, her (hirsute), in, my, your (Eu-
rOPeln 07“ (wonder), «he. Fats sometimes
used for eggs, as when you say, If what hens
10y in the shell. could perform on the stage
they would be like persons who wish every-
thing done to the letter because they would
be egg-acting (exacting). Take the syllable
bee. Why is making honey like whipping ?
Because it is a bee-laboring business. Take
the same syllable again. Sec from what a
remote point the following conundrum final-
ly comes round to the dictionary. Why is e
bee-hive like a rotten potato? A bee-hive
is a bee-holder, a bee-holder is a spectator, a
spec-tutor is a rotten potato. In the same
Way, the fish said to be most pleasant to a
happy wife is her-ring; a convalescent dys-
peptic is said to be like a reprievcd criminal,
because he cannot di-gest yet; a child who
gets stout as he grows taller is said to be
liken newspaper reporter, beCause he picks
up in-formation, &c. The incongruity of the
two subjects said to resemble each other‘ is
the merit Of' the following: Why is an old
man like a dog’s tail? Because he is in-firm.
101850 the Universalist Society at Lynn ot-
fered a reward Of a set of silver spoons for
the best conundrum. The man who tank
the prize was a student of the dictionary, for
this was his conundrum: Why is a-prolix
clergyman like an aged person? Because
they both di-late.
The most common form of the conun-
drum, of Course, is that winch is founded on
the simple panning application of aword;
here your spelling-book will afford you great
help, or you may read any humorous au-
thor and note down the puns he uses, re-
vamping them into conuullrunis. With
Words oi two syllables this is very well, but
it you go further than that, the spelling.
book is pertinps the best. It is really aston-
ishing to what extremes the passion for
wrenching w..rds from their ordinary mean—
ing is carried. Let us take some words of
three syllables A field of grass is like _a
person older than yourself, because it is
past-ur-age; the snows on Mont Blanc are
like a ship-builder, because they av-a-lanche
(have a launch) whenever they get ready;
cats are like unskillful surgeons, because
they mew-tillolate and destroy patients; the
heart of a lover is like a sea serpent, because
itis a sccreter (sea cretur) of great sighs
(size); gate-posts are like human creatures,
because they prop-a-gatc, a man who b981-
tates to sign the pledge is like a sceptical
Hiudoo, because he don’t know whether to
give up the J ug-or-not; if the ornithological
emblem of the United States were taken
sick, it would be contrary to law, because it
would he ill-eagle; a person who dislikes
writing resembles an inmate of Grecnwxch
' Hospital, because he is a pen-summer (pen-
sioner); a marriage certificate is like an ar-
ticle the public cannot do .Wlbhollt, because
it is a advise-paper; the patients who should
be put in the. highest pan of the hospital are
the roonrai'ics; when ilu' sewn wise men
of Greece 11101. the sage of Hiudostau, the
eight saw sages (ate sausages); molasses is
remarkable when it boils, because it is syrup-
rising (surprising) The Yorkshire W,
01'1844, asks, “ Why does a young lady’s
riding habit lftscllllile Shakspeare?
she’s(ofteu)mi~a minted (misquoted).” I do
not know that anything worse than that
could be invented now. Now to the word.
in four syllables. The plot of the ballet In
like the air tlcht msiume in which subma-
rine excursions are made, because it is for n
diver-tis-meaul ; the poet B ent’a head in
like a colored girl’s, because it cannot pro-
duce any more tiisin-a-Topsy's [grhonatop-
sis]; the kind ul essence whic a young
man likes Will-n l..- pops the question is ac-
uiescencc; the some of a kiss is elliptical
a iiptickle]; the must benevolent piece of
furniture is the chain ul-lftlile; the then up-
pointcd to wind up joint *‘ck com «HIPS
must be teetofallers, beenuse they are lqn,r
[h] aters; the man who sells fiddles is l;L~.-.
a musical instrument, because he is n Vlul .
seller [violincello] ; a new .patent mom I
trap is a cowardly affair, because it i- I
puzzle-any-mousc (pnsiila‘nimous) conun—
vanes. That will do. When conundrum:
require parentheses and italics they multbe
very bad. Yet there havebeen so many at
called good ones, that it is deemed rather a
merit than otherwise to make ‘0 verybnd
one. The person who said that a' swallow
was like a smoking chimney, because it had
a crooked flue [flew], thought he had done
wonders. '-
Similar mon atrocities are :' Why is killing
bees like a confession ? Beam you unbnzz
’em. Why is a person riding rapidly up hill
like one who resents a young lady with a
young dog ? cause he gives a at a pup.
In the following a long ward wfi so awful-
ly upon the rack . of the riddlerir Why are
the Arabs like a process 01 reasoning? Be-
cause they’re a racy hossy nationfrntiocinn—
lion]. And here probably is the most won-
derfully protracted pun ever mode: When
may a man be said to have a vefetoble fine-
piece? When he gets a potatoc ock [gets up
at eight o’clock]. , -‘ " '
Words in er, which come under one list
in the spelling-book, are often susceptible of
conundrums, as when his, saidthet the con-
stitution is right, and th ditor is a writer;
that the vulture is a low , and thinner who
shoots him a fowler; thht‘the'gfobedl'round
and a lady’s dress is roundiher; that- : mil-
ler is a moth and a matron is a mother; that
Connecticut is a nutmeg State, where shall
we find the grater? .‘cc. ' ‘ - '
We will use the dictionary once more.
Turn to .9, and di ct-Wer what words there
are which will furnish a puu by omittingthe
s; for instance sellout—take off 8 and, "on
have cool. New proceed thus: Why a a
man who does not lose his temper like a
schoolmaster? Because he keeps cool [keeps
school]. When does a man entertain his
"guest and horse alike? When the both
feed at his table [his stable]. Whyrig-a
man who goes up town after beer like the
goods in an auctioneers store ? Because he
is up for ’a ale [up for Sale]. Why II open
maceti like a busybod y ? Because it makes
scandals. There are others made on the
same principle, but for which the dictionary
affords but little help, us when in say that
an old dog is like an inclined plane, because
he’s a slow pup [slope up]; or that hen!
cannot see immortality, because they ge-
their necks twirled [next world] in this.
One of the worst Oi this class was 411'.
Holmes’e: Why is an onion like a piano?
Because it smell odious. A pun can also be
made sometimes by drawling or lengthening
out the pronunciation of a word, as when
we say that the kind of monkeys that grOw
on grape vines are gra-apes.
There are many rather pretty conundrumfl
drawn from nature. I have read such well-v
known ones as that the best time to read
the b00k of nature is when Autumn turns
the leaves; that the trees when they put on-
their new dress do not have to open their
trunks, because thcy_leaoe out a Summer
suit; that the grass is like a note of hand,
because it is relieved by filling dew; that
the stars should be the best astronomers, be-
cause they have studded the heavens ever
since creation. - .
A style of conundrum has become very:
frequent and popular which is founded on'n.
transposition of letters or words, ivin'ga
new and surprising sense. It gene 1y cum:
mences with “ what is the difference 2" 'I
have opened one package ofthie close. The
firsr. one is esfollows: What is the difler-
ence between stabbing a man and killiu
swine? One is assault with intent 10 RH;
and the other is a killing with intent to self;
So it is discovered of a cat and a document,
that one has paws at the end of its clitwi,‘
and the other pauses at the end of its din:
see; of a wife and an editor, that one cell
articles to rights, and the other writes arti-
cles to set; of the eagle and ascertain kind
of dog, that is a terrier in the sky, and‘the
other is a. Skye-terrier; of the permission to
speak and the command not to speak, thit
in the one case you are allowed to talk, and
iii the other you are not to talk cloud; of a
pound of meat and a drummer boy, that
one weighs a pound and the other pounds.
away; of an utterer of spurious coin and 0'
false heir, thatthe one issues a. counterfeit,
and the other counterfeits an issue; of"
church organist and the influenza, that one
knows the stops and the other steps the n04
see; of a successful lover and his rival, thit'
o'ne kisses his miss. and the other misses hfi‘
kiss; of an unsuccessful swain and a fathei
of a family, that one is a sighing lover and;
the other a loving sire; of a mischievous
mouse and a beautiful young lady, that one .
harms the cheese and the other chains the
he's; of seventeen and seventy, that one is
careless and happy, and the other hairless
and ceppy; of the effect of catching-cold
one of the isles of Greece, that in the
one case it is you cough, in the other Corfu;
of an emperor and a be er, the one issues
manifestoes, and the of er manifests toes
without his shoes; of a man boiling beets
and a man flogging him, that one cooks the
heels and the other beats the cook; of a
tailor and a siege gun, that one works the
breaches and the other breaches the work;
of the Prince of Wales and a bomb-shell,
that one is heir to the throne and the other
is thrown to the air; of “ Old Uncle Ned”
and Louis Napoleon in the event of another
French Revolution, that the one had no hair
on the lop of his crown, the place where the
hair ought to grow, and the other would
have no crown on the top of his head, the
place where the crown ought to go. It is
also mentioned that the difference between
a baby and a great coat is, that one you was
and the other you wear; that perseverance
is a strong will, and obstinscy a strong
won‘t; that Noah’s was a high ark, but that
an archbishop is a hierarch; 9f aganze dress
and a drawn tooth, that one is too thin and
the other IS tooth out; that the Prince of
Wales is an heir apparent, abald head lull .
ne’er 11 1.32001, and a gorilla has a hairy
parent. - _ _
As it relief from the ingenuity of the spe-
cimcus which I have glven,_it is Well to in-
trod ucc occasionally a question which ought.
to be Obvious to every one, but which in
not. For instance, what makes more nollo
than a pig under a gate? Two pigs. Why
does a traVeller who has been on a long
journey, and comes to a board fence in the
midst of a forest, try to get over-it? Be
cause he wants to get over? WI)“ II III.
best thing to do in a hurry? Nothin . Why
does the miller wear awhile but i’ 0 keep
his head warm.
It is so easy to make conundrnms that
most intelligent men will prefer to put their
incomes to some harder and more elem
task. A dancer once said to a Spartan “
can stand on one leg longer than you."“ er-
1131):; so," said the Spartan, “ and so can my_
goose.” .
«o»o—-——
—In a Paris paper appears on aliverfile-
menu—J Agency general for international
marriages. Happiness guarantled for I
year.” . .
-'I‘he case of George W. Gayle, the real
who was arrested for publishing an adver-
tisclncnt offering a reward for the murder of
Abraham Lincoln, came up at Montgomery
Alabama, on Tuesday. Gayle presented n
full pardon from Andrew Johnson, and the
ease was dismissed.
Norwalk Chronicler